The Green Mile
by pixelatrix
Summary: "So when you said stay out of trouble, did that include explosions?" Fem Shep & Zaeed pairing. Slight Spoilers for ME1, ME2 & ME3. Rated M for Language & Stuff.
1. Prologue

**A/N:**

**This will be an ongoing story featuring a romance between Shepard & Zaeed**

**This is AU-ish in a lot of ways, my stories always are. Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Shepard in this is : Earthborn, was on Elysium and renegade**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

**Read. Enjoy. Review. Follow. Favorite. I'll love you forever lol.**

Cara usually steered clear of military marks. Stealing from Alliance officers was risky at best; they were faster on their feet and more aware than the average civilian. But desperate times called for stupid measures. The two officers stepping out of the restaurant were the dipshits that she intended to pickpocket.

Waiting until they'd moved towards the less well-lit streets away from hustle and bustle of the main boulevard near the River Thames, Cara moved in for the kill. On a good day, she could steal anything from anyone. She had quick fingers and feet. But this wasn't a good day. She was injured, not fatally, or even that seriously. She'd gone without food for a day or two, and without sleep for longer. The tremor in her hand-made finesse almost impossible.

She took a deep breath to steady herself before moving closer. All she had to do was get close enough that the scanner on her omni-tool could siphon funds from their credit chits. It was something that she'd done a thousand times when she'd still been in the Reds. The hand that wrapped tightly around her wrist was _not_ something that she expected.

_Merda.*_

"Can we help you?"

Cara looked up to find a pair of bemused blue eyes watching her. "I…"

The man dragged her by the hand towards a nearby street lamp. He grabbed her by the chin to tilt her head around to get a look at the tattoo on her neck that had been burned beyond recognition. "You were kicked out of a gang?"

She yanked her head out of his grasp and refused to answer.

"You've got two options, kid. We take you to the local police station and let them toss you into the system. Or you can tell us what happened, and maybe we can help." The second man frowned at her; he had the faintest accent that made her wonder if he were from London.

"I wasn't going to take much. I'm just hungry." She rubbed her through her short black hair.

"Let's get you fed then, you can tell us your story…and the truth…not a pretty version it." The man with his hand on her wrist gave her a piercing gaze. "I'm Rear Admiral Steven Hackett. That's Staff Commander David Anderson."

"Rear…Admiral?" Cara couldn't hide the amusement. "Cara."

"Cara?"

"My name is Cara." She frowned at him when the Admiral failed to release her arm.

"No last name?" The Commander raised his eyebrow at her.

She shrugged. "I'm an orphan. I don't need one."

"Everyone needs a surname. It gives you an anchor." Anderson remarked while they stepped across the street towards what looked like Alliance housing.

Cara began to yank desperately to get away.

"Easy there. We aren't going to turn you in or hurt you." Hackett didn't let her go. "Would you rather we talk at the Alliance headquarters?"

She stopped struggling. "No, this is fine."

"I keep trying to place that accent. You aren't native to London are you?" Anderson asked while they headed into an apartment on the third floor. Hackett released her arm once they were inside. He wandered into the kitchen while the Commander stayed in the living room watching her cautiously.

"I've lived here for the last two years. I was born in Rome." She followed her nose into the kitchen. She hopped up on one of the kitchen counters ignoring the scowl sent her way by the Admiral. It must be his apartment.

"What gang were you with?" Hackett asked. He handed her a plate of leftovers.

She was too hungry to figure out what she was eating. She reminded herself to eat slowly. "Tenth Street Reds."

"And why were you jumped out*?" Anderson handed her a glass of water.

"Creative differences." She sipped the water before going back to the food.

"Be more specific, kid." The Commander didn't appear amused.

"I'm a thief. Not a murderer or a whore or a drug runner. We _creatively_ disagreed on my future role in the Reds." She took the last bite and set the plate on the counter. "No idea what that was but it was good."

"Carbonada Criolla.*" Hackett moved the plate into the sink. "So you have rules about the rules that you'll break?"

"Everyone has to live by a code of some sort," she shrugged.

"True." Anderson motioned for her to head into the living room. "How old are you?"

"Almost eighteen," She sat on the arm of one of the couches until Hackett pushed her down on the couch itself.

"Shouldn't you be in school?" Anderson clearly didn't understand what life was like for an orphan.

"I've been on the streets for a long time. Orphans aren't always treated that well. There was a local convent that offered two meals a day to street urchins who go to their school. I went until I was fifteen, and then came to London." She didn't feel like going into the ugly details of why she left Rome or how she got to London.

"When do you turn eighteen?" Hackett sat in a chair across from the couch.

"Four days."

"Do you have a plan?" Anderson asked.

"Avoid arrest." It was the truth.

"Have you thought about enlisting?" The casual tone from the Admiral didn't match his body language.

Cara had learned very early in life to watch the way a person moved and the tone of their voice as opposed to the words that came out of their mouth. She didn't doubt that the two men would turn her over to the police for her attempt at theft, if only to keep her off the streets. Enlisting hadn't occurred to her before, but it would be better than starving.

"Do I look like the military type?" She countered after thinking it over.

Hackett looked over at Anderson. "Yes, you do."

"Dipshits," she muttered under her breath. "I don't really have much of a choice."

"Not really," Anderson agreed.

"Sign me up then." Cara figured that at the very least, she'd be getting guaranteed meals. "How bad can it be?"

_Famous last words._

"You're going to need a last name," Hackett remarked.

"Name? I'm going to need more than that. I have a fake ID, but I don't think that'll impress the recruiters. And I'm wearing pretty much everything that I own." Cara started to feel a little overwhelmed.

"Consider it a birthday present." The Admiral waved off her concerns as if it was nothing.

"Present?" She raised an eyebrow. "Interesting concept. I'm not sure that I've ever had anything that I haven't stolen."

_Two Years Later_

* * *

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Cmdr. Anderson_

_Subj: Cara._

_Did you see the report from Ellison at Fort Charles?_

_She's being recommended for ICT._

_Have you heard from her recently?_

_Steven_

* * *

_From: Cmdr. Anderson_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: Cara_

_That's what she gets for getting bumped up to 2__nd__ Lieutenant so quickly._

_I hope __Vila Militar is ready for her._

_Did you read the addendum to his report?_

_She managed to steal every pair of Alliance issue underwear from the Drill Instructors quarters and dye them pink. They can't prove that she did it though. They never seem to be able to prove it. _

_She also dyed her hair green. I told you stop telling her that she'd be walking the green mile._

_I haven't heard from her in months. Probably because the last time I emailed her, I told her to stop hacking my account._

_David_

* * *

Two years later, First Lieutenant Cara Shepard stepped off the transport on Elysium for her first shore-leave in four years. She'd just finished up her N5 classification training. It had been off-planet and exhausting. Between assignments, she had been ordered to take leave. _Dipshits. _Elysium had not been her choice for vacation. It had been another _recommendation._ Hackett liked to make orders sound like suggestions. He was very good at it.

* * *

_From: Lt. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: Shore-Leave_

_Is this punishment for not getting caught doing whatever it is you think that I did at that merc base?_

_Why am I on Elysium?_

_Cara_

* * *

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Lt. Shepard_

_Subj: re: Elysium._

_It's a beautiful colony._

_There's plenty to do._

_Stay out of trouble._

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Lt. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: Elysium._

_Is that an attempt at haiku?_

_Thanks for the help._

_Cara_

* * *

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Lt. Shepard_

_Subj: re: Elysium._

_I'll reconsider if you want to tell me what the hell happened down there._

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Lt. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: Elysium._

_I'll be sure to send you a postcard from Elysium._

_Cara_

* * *

**A/N:**

**References:**

**Merda = Shit**

**Carbonada Criolla is an Argentinian stew.**

**Jumped out refers to the process of being kicked out of a gang, usually involves a brutal beating. **


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

**Read. Enjoy. Review. Follow. Favorite. I'll love you forever lol.**

"Aren't you a little short for a marine? And since when do marines have green hair?" The man who'd followed her towards where the batarians were starting to breakthrough finally spoke.

"_Vaffanculo_." Cara spun around to grab him by the collar of his armor and shoved him up against a nearby wall. "Look dipshit, I'm about to blow thus fuckers into the atmosphere. If you want to help, great, but if you want to spend the whole time talking about my height and hair, maybe I'll just shoot you and save the mercs the bullets."

"Bitch."

"That's Lieutenant Bitch, to you." She let go of him and continued towards the breach in the defenses. "Can you actually shoot that rifle?"

He just raised an eyebrow at her.

"I have a plan. All I need for you to do is to try to point that rifle in the general direction of the mercs, can you manage that?" She ducked behind a column to get a couple of the explosive mines that she'd _borrowed_ from the Alliance weapons depot ready.

"What the bloody hell are you doing?" He frowned at her.

"Blowing shit up. It's what I'm good at." Cara winked at him then began darting between columns to get closer to the wall that had been broken through.

There was a muffled _bloody bitch_ before she heard his rifle fire. Whoever he was, he was a damn good shot. He kept a steady stream of bullets going and almost everyone hit a mark. Cara used the diversion to get right up to the wall. The hail of gunfire had caused the mercenaries to back up far enough that she could set the mines on several nearby columns. She placed the charges so that the columns would fall across the hole.

The timing on the detonations had to be precise. It gave her a very short window to get back out of range of the blast. She slid around a column across the way just before explosions erupted behind her. She risked a glance to find that the columns had done what she'd hoped and created a barrier.

It was several hours before reinforcements from the Alliance arrived. She spent most of the rest of that time shooting batarians and pirates, organizing the ground teams and making sure that her fix of the breach held. Once the _cavalry_ arrived, the fucking cowards ran away.

_Dipshits._

With the threat of imminent doom gone, Shepard decided to head towards a nearby bar that had opened up the moment the pirates were all gone. She sat at the end of the bar and drank beer. It wasn't often that she had to engage the enemy on shore-leave in a t-shirt and jeans with no army and mostly colonists for backup. She was going to need another beer.

"You've got balls for a little bit of nothing." The man from early sat on the barstool next to hers.

Cara leaned back and slid a hand between her legs. "Nope, no balls. Do you have name, aside from cranky dipshit?"

"Zaeed Massani." He waved the bartender over to order a scotch. "How about you?"

"Cara, Lieutenant Cara Shepard." She tapped her beer bottle against his glass in salute. "_Massani. _Why is that name so familiar?"

He shrugged before pointing to the marred tattoo on her neck. "You were in a gang?"

"Tenth Street Reds." She couldn't quite place why she knew his name, and then she caught sight of the tattoo on his neck. "The suns. You were part of the Blue Suns."

Massani raised an eyebrow at her. "I'm just a bounty hunter."

"I met Vido Santiago once, a few years ago. He told some interesting stories about the Suns, and you." She tapped her empty beer on the bar to get the bartender's attention.

"And why would he tell you a goddamn thing?" Zaeed asked.

"_Lieutenant Shepard?"_

Cara turned to find a Corporal standing in the doorway. "Be right there."

"Hey, Little Bit, do me a favor?" Zaeed held an arm out to stop her from walking away.

"Maybe." She held out her credit chit to the bartender to pay for the beers.

"I wasn't here."

"You look pretty here to me." Cara tapped her finger against his arm.

"But…I wasn't." The look in his eyes turned him from casual drinker into dangerous in a mere second.

"Fine, you were a figment of my imagination." She pushed his arm out-of-the-way but paused beside him to lean down to whisper in his ear. "Not a bad looking figment at that."

"You didn't tell me why Vido talked to you." Zaeed reminded her.

"No, I didn't." She winked at him before heading out of the bar.

Shepard followed the Corporal across the colony to a nearby building. She stepped inside the first floor office to find Admiral Hackett in conversation with a few of the colony leaders that she vaguely recognized from the fighting early in the day.

"Sir." Cara snapped a tired salute at the Admiral.

"I've been listening to the reports of what happened here, Lieutenant Shepard. You did a hell of a thing." Hackett motioned for the two other men in the room to leave.

"Thanks." She leaned back against one of the desks. "So when you said stay out of trouble, did that include explosions?"

"Cara."

"Can I get shore-leave to recover from the relaxing shore-leave that I just had?" She perched on the edge of the desk. "You know, you were right, there was plenty to do on Elysium."

"I understand that you had a little help when you went to secure the perimeter." Hackett picked up a datapad to read from it. "A 'man in black and yellow armor' to be precise."

"They must have been mistaken in the chaos. It was just me," she shrugged casually.

"Like it was just you during your combat training for the N4 designation?" He didn't appear to be convinced.

"Yes."

"The shuttle you were in crash-landed on a planet. You managed to patch up the injuries of your squad and fend off the Blue Suns. You cleared out the base on your own while waiting for pick up." Hackett frowned at her. "The trouble with that is that your comm was turned off for two hours while you were in that base. And when reinforcements arrived, the base was completely emptied."

"And?"

"Cara?" He stepped close to her. "Do you know how incredibly infuriating it is to never have physical proof of what you are accused of?"

"That's what you get for pushing a thief into the Alliance," she smiled at him.

*****_** Vaffanculo = Fuck You**_


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Lt. Cmdr. Shepard_

_Subj: Congratulations._

_On your promotion and N7 designation._

_I understand that they're sending you to the base in Tokyo. _

_Good luck._

_Stay out of trouble._

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Lt. Cmdr. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: Trouble_

_I am a beacon of innocence._

_Cara_

* * *

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Lt. Cmdr. Shepard_

_Subj: re: Trouble_

_Then why do I have multiple reports regarding an incident in Santiago between you and a known mercenary. Hmm? _

_And then there's my personal favorite, the reports about your damn hair. And did you really steal Team Zeta's mascot?_

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Lt. Cmdr. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: Trouble_

_If there was actual proof of any of that, I'd be in the brig._

_Aside from the hair._

_Haven't you learned not to believe everything that you read?_

_Cara_

_P.S. I'm taking shore-leave before I head to Tokyo. Thought I'd visit London for my birthday._

* * *

Her new assignment didn't start for a couple of weeks. It had been ten years since she visited her old stomping grounds in London. It was a little weird to be back. At least this time, she could afford a damn hotel room and food. She wasn't little orphan Cara on the streets. She picked a hotel that was on the opposite side of London from her old haunts, it would hopefully keep her from running into any of the Reds.

"I've been looking for you."

Cara looked up to find Vido Santiago waiting for her as she stepped out of the hotel. "Why?"

"You fucking know why." His hand gripped her elbow to lead her across the street towards a nearby park. "Twice now, twice you've killed my men and destroyed one of my bases. But not me."

"And? If you hand me that pistol that you're hiding, I can remedy that mistake." She kept her voice low.

"Stop fucking with my operations." Vido scowled at her.

"Or what?"

"I am not a man to be trifled with, Cara Mia." His fingers tightened around her elbow.

With a bemused smile, Shepard twisted around until he let go of her elbow. She swept him off his feet once they'd reached a more secluded part of the park. With one hand pressing his arm behind his back, she grabbed the pistol hidden under his shirt and pointed it at the back of his head.

"And I'm not a woman to be trifled with.' She crouched down with the gun pressed to his temple. "I told you never to call me that again."

"You didn't mind it the last time." He twisted his head to smirk at her.

"Vaffanculo," she cursed at him. "I'm going to walk away. If you follow me, I'll shoot your dick off."

Cara had barely made it three steps when she saw two familiar figures walking towards her. She stowed the pistol under her jacket and glanced back to find Vido up off the ground and heading in the opposite direction. From the speed in his movements, he'd seen the Alliance officers heading their way.

"Whatever it is, I didn't do it." Shepard turned back to greet Hackett and Anderson.

"Who was that?" Anderson pointed towards the rapidly disappearing figure.

"More importantly, why were you holding a pistol to his head?" Hackett added.

"That was…a _former_ friend. London is littered with _old_ acquaintances." She shrugged indifferently. "Speaking of old, what are you two doing here?"

"Does this friend have a name?" Anderson asked.

"I'm sure he does." She never gave names to either of them. If they had names, they could find proof. "So…why _are_ you here? The last I heard, you were both on Arcturus."

"Tradition." Hackett reminded her.

_Merda_.

She'd forgotten all about the tradition that they'd started the year after she enlisted in the Alliance. Every year on her birthday, one or both of them would take her out for a meal.

Cara was never certain why they had done it all those years ago. But they'd gotten her patch up and somehow managed to become her legal guardians. It enabled her to get _official_ identification papers and sign up at a recruiter's office. The two men had taken their _guardianship _of her fairly serious even if she'd turned fucking eighteen three days after.

"So what's his name?" Anderson prompted after a moment while they walked out of the park together.

"Who?" She ran a hand through her hair to straighten it out.

"Cara."

"That would be my name." Shepard kicked absently at a rock on the sidewalk. "In the past ten years, have you _ever_ been able to get me to talk about something that I didn't want to talk about?"

"No."

"How about you buy me dinner and skip the pointless interrogation? It'd make for a nice change." She laughed at the mutual annoyance displayed on their faces.

Stepping into her hotel room a few hours later, Cara frowned when she noticed her gear sitting on the floor. She was fairly certain that she'd left it on the bed. The door behind her slid closed and a moment later she was pressed up against the wall with a forearm to her throat.

"Why did Vido Santiago visit you today?" Zaeed Massani growled at her.

"Ask him." She grabbed his arm, moved her knee between his legs and then spun him around so their positions were reversed. "The last man who snuck into my room ended up gutted in an alley. I'd really rather not ruin my birthday with a side of body dumping."

"You changed your hair." His fingers reached up to touch a strand. Her hair was longer than it had been the last time, black with dark green streaks. "I like it."

"Is this where I bat my eyelashes and go all gooey inside?" Cara brushed his hand away from her face. "Why are you in _my_ hotel room?"

"Why was that goddamn bastard looking for you?" Zaeed ignored her question.

"He seemed a little irritable about the fact that I destroyed a Blue Suns bases as part of my N4 qualification." She decided to go with part of the truth. "You seem a little _crabby_."

"Vido Santiago is _not_ a man to be trusted." Zaeed lifted his hands up to push her back away from him.

"Neither is Zaeed Massani." She gave him a sardonic look before wandering over to the doors that led out to her balcony. She stepped out into the damp night air to lean her arms on the railing as she looked across the city.

Massani followed her out. He moved behind her and his hands rested beside her arms on the rail. "Am I not a man to be trusted?"

Cara turned around so that she was facing him. "I don't _trust_ anyone."

"You're a cynical little bit," he chuckled.

"If its information on Santiago that you're looking for, you can stop with whatever the hell you're calling this attempt at seduction. I don't know where he is, and I'm not really sure what he wanted. Things deteriorated rapidly once I put a gun to his head." She reached behind her to pull the gun out of her jacket. "This gun, it was on him."

Zaeed grabbed the pistol to get a better look at it. "Fucking bastard. He's still using this thing."

"Still?"

Massani tossed the weapon on the little table on the balcony before pointing to the scar on his face. "I have up close and personal experience with it."

"Maybe I'll ship it back to him in pieces." Cara had done that once to one of her squad leader's weapons. It had proved highly entertaining.

"Did you say that it was your birthday?" Zaeed ran a finger along the marred tattoo on her neck.

"I did."

"Let's celebrate." He stepped back from the railing. "There's a great pub that I know, seedy little place, serves the best goddamn whiskey in town and the cook isn't half bad."

"Fine. But you're buying, and leave Vido's pistol where it is. I have plans for it." She shoved him towards the door and away from the weapon on the table.

"Bossy little bit," he muttered.

"Merda. What is with you and the little bit thing?" Cara led him out of the room.

"You're just not big enough to be a bitch." He smirked at her.

"_Vaffanculo." _

* * *

_From: V.S._

_To: C.S._

_Subj: Weapon._

_The Blue Suns received a package with my name on it._

_It contained the pieces of my favorite pistol._

_Very fucking amusing, Cara._

_Vido_

* * *

_From: C.S._

_To: V.S._

_Subj: re: Weapon_

_Good luck putting it back together._

_Cara_


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

_Arcturus._

Cara stared in confusion at the orders that she'd just received in her inbox. She was an infiltrator and a bomb tech expert. Her job was to either take the damn things apart or blow things up with them. There really wasn't much of a call for that on Arcturus. With the exception of a few brief assignments to the second fleet, she'd spent the last four years in Tokyo. And now she was being told to report to Arcturus in a week.

It was her twenty-seventh birthday. Her squad leader had granted her the shore-leave that she'd requested. She found a great noodle shop that had the best food and even better saké not far from her assigned housing so she headed there on her way home. She was barely through her first little shot of alcohol and hadn't even started on the noodles when someone slid into the seat across from hers.

"Go away." She didn't bother looking up.

"No."

Cara set the saké down and looked up at Vido. "Don't you have a mercenary organization to run?"

"You destroyed another base of mine." He frowned at her. "I'm going to start taking it personally."

"How very sad for you." She started in on her soup before it got cold.

"Cara Mia." He reached out to brush a drop of soup from the bottom of her lip. "Why do you insist on provoking me?"

"Remove your hand or I will remove it from your body." Cara pushed the bowl away. She obviously wasn't going to get to enjoy it.

Vido glanced at something over her shoulder. "This conversation is not over."

"What conversation?" She twisted around to see what he was looking at and found Hackett heading towards her. She turned back to Vido to find that he was already gone. "Dipshit."

"Commander Shepard." Hackett eased into the seat that Santiago had vacated a moment earlier.

"Admiral." Cara pulled the soup back in front of her and went back to eating.

"Why were you having dinner with the leader of the Blue Suns?" Hackett waved the waiter over to order noodles for himself.

"I wasn't. He sat himself down without giving me a chance to tell him to take a hike." She grinned at up at the Admiral. "You have something in common with him."

Hackett raised an eyebrow at her.

She set her chopsticks down. "What?"

"You've had three encounters with the Blue Suns that I'm aware of. Vido Santiago takes a keen interest in you. You don't think that I should find that…strange?" Hackett didn't look like he found it strange, he looked concerned.

"You can find it whatever you want." She waved her empty saké glass at the woman behind the counter.

"Cara."

Shepard waited until her glass was filled before looking up at Hackett. "You get three questions. Make them good ones, after that, I don't want to talk about Vido or the Blue Suns or anything else that might be construed as _Alliance_ talk. It's my birthday. We'll drink, and I'll tell you about the fake grenade that I absolutely did not leave in the watch commander's office yesterday."

Hackett shook his head with a smile. "How do you know Santiago?"

"Personally? He saved my life fifteen years ago in Rome." Cara tossed back the saké before continuing. "I think he considered it a way of balancing out his karma. And he helped me travel to London a year later."

"Was Santiago the man who helped you on Elysium?" Hackett asked.

"Nope." She finished up the last of her noodles. "One more question."

"What did he want today?" He finally queried after a long moment of silence.

"I'm not sure. He seemed annoyed that I keep destroying Blue Suns outposts." Cara shrugged indifferently. "What are you doing in Tokyo, anyway? I thought Anderson said you guys couldn't make it for my annual birthday dinner."

"I rearranged my schedule. We didn't want to break with tradition," he explained. "Did you say fake grenade?"

"No." She flashed a wicked grin at him. "Oh hey, do you like the hair?"

"We really need to rewrite the regs about appropriate physical appearance." He shook his head at her.

Her hair was now down to the middle of her back. It was black with green that started at the tips of her hair and went halfway. It looked like she'd dipped her hair in a can of paint. She ended up twirling it up into a multi-colored bun half the time. It drove her squad leader crazy. It also drove her _guardians_ crazy.

Hackett had to head back to Arcturus a few hours later and Shepard decided to go home. She stepped into her living room to find familiar figure sitting on her couch.

_Merda._

"Massani." She dropped into the recliner that sat opposite the couch. "What do you want?"

"Happy Birthday, Little Bit." He tossed a small package at her.

She raised an eyebrow at him but focused on the box in her hand. She lifted the lid to find heat sink and a rosary. The rosary looked strangely familiar. "What is this?"

"The priest that you thought Vido killed? He didn't kill him. He put him on his payroll." Zaeed leaned back against the couch with his arm draped along the top of it. "I found the bastard in Tuscany."

"He's alive?" Cara lifted the rosary out of the box. "Affanculo.*"

"He was alive." Massani pointed at the heat sink. "I thought you'd like a souvenir."

"Why?" She had no doubts in her mind that there was an ulterior motive.

"You needed to understand the truth about Santiago," Zaeed shrugged. "And the fucking priest needed to die."

"Yes, he really did. And what do you expect in return?" She set the box aside.

"Nothing…now." He ignored the skeptical look that she sent him. "I'm going to kill Vido one of these days. Don't bloody interfere."

"Why the hell would I interfere?" She plucked the rosary out of the box. It was time to send another package to the Blue Suns. "I'll help."

"You didn't seem to mind his goddamn attention."

"Jealous, Massani?" She tossed the empty box at him. "You don't need to be, not of Vido Santiago."

"So who do I need to be jealous of?" He dodged the box and it sailed over the back of the couch.

"At the moment, my sexual escapades are more like a desert than a raging river." Cara hadn't really dated anyone in a while.

"Do you have plans for your shore-leave?"

"No." She tossed the heat sink up in the air and caught it.

"Do you want plans?" Zaeed crouched in front of her recliner.

* * *

_From: V.S._

_To: C.S._

_Subj: Rosary. _

_Why did you send me a fucking rosary?_

_Vido_

* * *

_From: C.S._

_To: V.S._

_Subj: re: rosary._

_It's a gift from an old friend of yours. Someone that I thought was dead._

_Father Gessati who up until a few days ago was alive and well._

_May he rot in hell and take you with him._

_Cara_

**Affanculo = Fuck it all.**


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N:**

**Shout out to Kira Kyuu for the idea for the necklace. =)**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

The general impression that Cara had after being on Arcturus for two weeks was not a good one. It was filled with the worst kind of Alliance officers…politicians. Hackett had told her once she arrived that the assignment was temporary. _ Captain_ Anderson had just received a new appointment to the _Normandy. _ His XO? Commander Cara Shepard.

_Merda._

All she had to do was keep control of her temper for six months. She foresaw a lot of time spent in the shooting range on the station. The brass had been interested in her solution for a glitch in one of the newly designed timed electrical charges from her last mission in Tokyo. The time that she wasn't in the shooting range, she was in a research lab trying to replicate it sufficiently that it could be incorporated into the design.

So far?

Three weeks in and she'd only managed to singe her hair. There was a secure area attached to the lab where she spent a fair amount of her day testing explosions, not for research, but for fun. She was tweaking a mine when a light flashed indicating that someone was about to step into the room. Disabling the explosive, she turned to find Hackett moving towards her.

"Admiral?" She stood up to offer him a salute.

"Are you actually…" His voice trailed off. He leaned in a little closer to get a better look at something. "Why are you wearing a heat sink around your neck?"

_Merda._

Cara shoved the necklace back under her shirt. "It's a souvenir and a reminder."

"A reminder?" Hackett quirked his eyebrows up.

"Some people need to die. Mercy shouldn't always be given." She glared at him when he started to ask another question. "And no, I'm not going to explain further. Did you need something?"

"Take a lunch break."

Cara was immediately suspicious. "What do you need me to do?"

"Always so suspicious," he chuckled before starting for the door. "You'll never know if you don't join me for lunch."

_Dipshit._

She followed him out of the lab once she'd secured the mine that she had been working on. She waited until they were sitting across from each other in one of the restaurants on the station to ask. "So?"

"How long until you have the fix worked out for the explosive?" Hackett asked.

"Not sure."

"Cara." He gave her a knowing look.

"An hour," she admitted with a belabored sigh.

Hackett pinched the bridge of his nose. "And you've delayed for weeks why?"

"Explosions are entertaining." Cara focused on her plate of food.

"Entertaining?" Hackett sounded suddenly incredibly exhausted. "Your expertise has been requested by the Third Fleet."

"Oh?"

"They're running into problems clearing out a Blue Suns base in the Attican Traverse. They're running into timed explosives that we haven't seen before." Hackett waved over his yeoman who handed a datapad to her. "We lost one squad already. Think you can figure it out?"

"The Blue Suns?" Cara raised an eyebrow.

"Is there a problem, Commander?" Hackett had is metaphorical Admiral hat on again.

"No, sir." She hid her smirk by peering intently at the report.

Three days later, Shepard found herself clearing out yet another Blue Suns base. The base was emptier than she'd anticipated. She also hadn't seen one of the _mysterious_ mines. Her squad had stayed by the shuttle since they'd be useless if they triggered an explosion. She stepped into a room deep into the lower portion of the building to find Vido reclined back in a chair like he didn't have a care in the world.

_Affanculo._

"Did you really miss me that much?" Cara lifted her pistol up.

"You've been ignoring my messages," he complained.

"I've been busy." She shifted her aim and took a shot. The bullet hit barely an inch from his hand resting on the arm of the chair. "Is there a reason you went to this elaborate scheme to see me, dipshit?"

Vido glanced down at the bullet-seized hole in his chair. He surged up out of the chair towards her. He grabbed her wrist and forced both her hand and weapon to the side. He backed her up against the nearby desk, the edge of it pushed painfully into her lower back.

"I don't like to be ignored, Cara Mia." He squeezed her wrist until she dropped the pistol.

"And I don't like being manhandled." She slammed her head into his chin when he leaned in closer. The force of it sent him backwards. She grabbed her pistol and had it pointed at him before he recovered. "I should shoot you in the head. Hell, I could probably get Massani to pay me for doing it."

"Go ahead, shoot me." Vido waited with one eyebrow raised before continuing. "Then stop pointing the fucking pistol at me."

"Stronzo." She lowered the weapon then pulled the trigger. The shot barely clipped him on the left side of his arm. "I owed you a life. So I'm not shooting you in the head. I will next time."

"Remember Italy, Cara?" His voice followed her out the door.

_Merda. _

She turned around to head back inside the room. Shoving her pistol into the holster on her back, she pulled out medi-gel to apply it to the wound on his arm. Her aim had been damn good; she'd barely broken the skin. Crouched down beside him, she sat back on her heels to frown at him in annoyance.

"Why didn't you kill him?" Cara asked.

"It would've led back to you. No one even knew that the Blue Suns were involved. A high-ranking leader of the church found dead? It wouldn't have gone well for you. I paid for his silence and made sure he never got within a hundred yards of another teenager." Vido sat up and twisted his arm around to get a better look at the healing wound. "You're still a damn good shot."

"Dipshit," she muttered. "I'm leaving. Stop using weird explosives just to get my attention. But I'd love to get a look at one."

Vido stood up and yanked her up with him. He nodded to a compact box sitting on the edge of nearby table. "Help yourself."

She glanced down at the fingers still wrapped around her wrist. "Are you planning on letting go of my arm at some point?"

"No." He jerked her around until her body slammed into his. "I'm not finished with you yet."

"I will shoot you in the head this time." Cara lifted her free hand to use it as a shield when he tried to lean down for a kiss. "The little one that is."

"Would you like me to beg for it, Cara Mia?" He whispered in her ear.

With an annoyed sigh, Shepard decided that she'd had enough smug dipshit for one afternoon. With a sharp twist to the left, she broke his hold on her wrist. She grabbed the back of his head and slammed him into the wall. Pausing to brush the dust off of her armor, she picked up the explosive that he'd left for her and walked out of the room. It would be a while before he woke up.

She chuckled to herself as she walked out of the base to the waiting shuttle. A second shuttle nearby caught her attention. It wasn't Alliance and it wasn't one of the Blue Suns vehicles. She tossed the box to one of the waiting marines and told them to get ready to leave.

Cara glanced into the open shuttle to find Zaeed pointing a rifle at her. "Did the universe get a two for one sale on dipshits today? _Merda._ Maybe I should've said a few more hail marys."

"Little Bit." He lowered his weapon. "Is Vido here?"

She hesitated for a moment before responding. She didn't have a problem with Massani getting his revenge, but it should be on fair footing and not when Santiago was knocked out on the ground. "No. He bolted when we arrived."

Zaeed frowned at her. "You wouldn't goddamn lie to me, would you?"

"Definitely."

"Cara."

"What? I would definitely lie to you any damn day of the week if I thought it was necessary." She shrugged because it was true and he would do the same thing. "If I do hear anything about him, I'll be sure to let you know."

She darted away from the hand that reached out for her and jogged back over to the waiting Alliance shuttle. If Massani headed into the base and found Vido, that was not her problem, she'd done her part. It was six hours before she finally arrived back on Arcturus. She'd already filed her report with Hackett so she headed to the research lab to drop off the new explosive for testing. She had intended to head back to her quarters for a long shower when she received a message from Hackett.

"_My Office. Now._"

He was pacing the office when she arrived several minutes later. "Commander."

"Admiral." She offered a semi-decent salute before collapsing into one of the chairs in front of his desk.

"Did I say you could sit?" Hackett was in what she usually referred to as _full Admiral-mode_.

"No, sir." Cara dragged herself up into an at-ease position. "Is there a problem?"

"You went into the base. _Alone. _You came out after two hours with an unexploded mine and no evidence of the Blue Suns anywhere. Care to explain?" Hackett scrolled through the report in his hand.

"It's all in the report." She motioned towards it.

"Cara."

"Can I sit down? I'm exhausted." She dropped back in the chair when he nodded. "I don't have anything else to add to my report, Admiral."

Hackett perched on the edge of his desk in front of her. "Off the record, Cara, what the hell happened? You can't tell me that for the third or fourth damn time in your short career that you went on a solo mission to a mercenary base and came out without a scratch because the base was miraculously empty."

"Off the record?" She didn't bother to smother her laughter. "Admiral Hackett doesn't do _off the damn record."_

"Answer three questions, off the record, and I'll accept your report as is." He set the datapad on his desk.

"One question."

"Two," he immediately countered.

"Done," she agreed. "And you're buying dinner."

"I always buy dinner."

"That's what happens when you pick up an orphan off the street." Cara leaned back in the chair.

"I'll remember that for next time." Hackett knocked her feet down when she tried to rest them on his desk. "What happened at the base today?"

"I shot Vido Santiago. Then I slammed his head into a wall. He was the only mercenary at the base." She kept her tone casual.

Hackett started to respond, and then she figured that he stopped to think carefully about the second question. "Are you in the Blue Suns?"

Cara straightened up in her chair. "No."

"No?"

"No." She decided that it was time for this conversation to be over. "I'll skip dinner. Am I dismissed?"

He looked like he was about to press her further but finally just waved her out of his office. "Anderson wanted me to tell you to respond to his _'damn message'_."

"Parents," she muttered with a grin before heading out office to her quarters.

* * *

_From: Vido Santiago_

_To: Cara Shepard_

_Subj: Massani_

_Now what did you say to Zaeed to convince him to leave without checking the base?_

_Hmm?_

_Vido_

* * *

_From: Cara Shepard_

_To: Vido Santiago_

_Subj: re: Massani_

_You seem very confused._

_Did you hit your head on something?_

_Cara_


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

"Commander." Anderson stood waiting for her by the airlock of the _Normandy._

"Captain." Cara hefted her duffle bag up over her shoulder. "Permission to come aboard?"

Anderson rolled his eyes. "Try to behave yourself, Cara. For my sake?"

Shepard grinned at him before heading down the bridge then beyond to find the crew quarters. She found her locker to store her gear then checked out her bunk. It was suitably uncomfortable. The ship would be heading out on its first tour in a few hours.

She'd already met most of the crew and dismissed them as standard Alliance. Joker was definitely the exception. She spent a fair amount of time sitting in the co-pilot chair trading jokes with him. It also annoyed Anderson because he seemed to be under the impression that they would bring out the worst in each other.

Crawling up into her top bunk, she checked her messages.

* * *

_From: Z. M._

_To: C. S._

_Subj: Vido._

_So he was in the base the whole time?_

_And you lied to me about it._

_Why?_

_Z._

* * *

_From: C. S._

_To: Z. M._

_Subj: re: Vido_

_Was he? _

_I must've missed him._

_Cara_

* * *

Six months later, Cara sat in Chora's Den watching the dancers. She was waiting for Harkin to show up. She'd sent Alenko and Williams back to the ship. They were too damn straight-laced to deal with something like this. One of the bouncers came over to tell her that someone wanted to talk to her; she stepped back into a private room and was _not_ surprised to find Vido. She rested her hand on her pistol while the bouncer gave them privacy.

"_Vaffanculo."_

"You gave me a concussion." Vido started to walk towards her.

"Come closer, I'll do it again." Cara kept her arms loose at her side.

"Cara Mia."

She glared at him. "Stop calling me that, dipshit."

"No. I like the way it rolls off of my tongue, and so do you." Vido moved closer. "Are you going try to tell me that once was enough for you?"

"Once was clearly too much." She smirked at him.

He took another step and had her backed up against the sealed door. His head tilted to the side so his lips hovered against her jaw. "Was it? Are you certain about that Cara? What would I find if I delved my fingers between your legs?"

"Armor." Cara placed a hand on his chest and shoved him back away from her. "I have things to do, Vido. What do you want?"

The grin on his face said it all. Cara rolled her eyes and headed out of the door. If he thought she was going to roll back into bed with him, he was a damn fool. She wouldn't deny that she had enjoyed the brief fling that they'd had, but he was the worst kind of dangerous man. He'd as soon fuck her over as fuck her.

Shepard met with Harkin to get his information. He bore the brunt of her frustration with Santiago and ended up on the floor with his drink over his head. She paused to send Massani a message to let him know that Vido had made an appearance on the Citadel. That would give the Blue Suns leader something else to deal with for a while.

Getting the evidence against Saren had been more complicated than she anticipated; she'd managed to find Garrus and made a quick stop at C-sec HQ to talk the Krogan bounty hunter into joining them. He made dealing with Fist easier and once they saved the young quarian, they had everything that they needed to convince the idiots on the council that Saren needed taken care of.

_Merda. She hated politicians_.

She'd been made a spectre and told to hunt down the murderous bastard. But, they hadn't figured out how she was supposed to do that. She had a week to wander around the Citadel running errands for people, her least favorite thing in the entire world. She spent most of the time with Garrus and Wrex. They seemed the most like-minded.

Stepping into the elevator alone to head to Chora's Den for a drink, Cara walked right into Vido. His eyes narrowed the moment he caught sight of her. She was in fatigues instead of her armor so her weapons were on the _Normandy_. The elevators on the Citadel seriously needed a tune-up, they were way to slow.

"Vido." She eyed him cautiously with her back to the elevator wall.

"Send any messages recently." He took the two steps across the elevator and rested his hands on either side of the wall behind her.

"Plenty. Did you have a specific one in mind?" Cara asked.

Vido slammed his fist into the elevator an inch from her head. "Not a fucking joke, Cara. You told Massani where I was."

"And? If I did? I don't owe you a damn bit of allegiance. I'm not in the Blue Suns, which you seem to forget, and I'm not in a relationship with you." Cara didn't even flinch.

His hand pressed against the base of her throat. "You. Told._ Him_. Where. I. Was."

"I suggest that you remove your hand before I break every bone in it, dipshit." She would only give him one warning.

"Is that so?" He leaned forward until she could feel his breath against her lips. "Would you really, Cara Mia?"

"In a damn heartbeat, and you know it, _stronzo._" She spat back at him.

"Liar." He closed the distance between their mouths. It was a brutal, bruising kiss. His hand tightened on her neck while his tongue pushed between her lips.

Cara forced herself to swallow down the moan that threatened at the intensity of the touch. She reached up her hand to grab his hand. She grabbed one of his fingers bending it close to the breaking point. "Touch me again, and I'll break more than your finger."

She left him in the elevator with a broken finger and stormed through the markets towards the skycab terminal. She hopped into one to head to the Presidium. It was one of the few locations on the Citadel that Santiago wouldn't bother her.

The weird readings that she had gotten from a terminal in Flux had led her to the Emporium. Once she dealt with the AI by short-circuiting the damn power junction, she turned around to head back to the _Normandy _only to find Zaeed Massani standing at the top of the stairs blocking her exit.

"If you're looking for Vido, I haven't seen him since I broke his finger." Cara decided to beat him to the punch.

"I was looking for you. Santiago's already left the Citadel." Zaeed frowned at her. "You broke his finger?"

"He didn't listen to my first warning," she shrugged. She found herself focusing on his lips. The kiss with Vido had been hot, aggravating but hot. A comparison kiss was definitely necessary.

"What the bloody hell are you thinking about, Little Bit?" He raised an eyebrow at her.

Cara didn't answer his question. Instead, she grabbed him by the arm and pulled him around the corner. She had to stand on her toes to get the angle that she needed for the first touch of her lips to his. Zaeed's hands went to her waist; he lifted her up and set her on top of a nearby set of stacked crates. Standing between her legs, it put them at eye level to continue the kiss. His hand rested on her shoulder while his tongue began to tangle with hers.

"Better," she muttered when they came up for air.

"Better than what?"

With a grin, Cara hopped down from the crate and ducked under his arm. He didn't follow her when she headed to the elevator that went down to C-sec Headquarters. She stepped out of the second elevator to head to the airlock only to find Anderson and Udina waiting for her. Udina had decided that the _Normandy_ was going to be _her _ship.

"What the _hell_ is going on?" Cara ignored the ambassador to focus on Anderson.

"You need a ship. The crew knows you. It's a perfect fit." He gave her a warning look that she had no intention of heeding.

"They're fucking you over." She gave her more accurate assessment of the situation. "I won't be used as the tool to toss you to the sidelines."

"You're a spectre now, Commander. You need a ship and a crew. Don't make this more difficult," Anderson countered.

Cara turned her ire towards Udina. She stepped close enough to lower her voice so that Anderson couldn't hear. "You've just put yourself on my list. You don't want on my list. No one _fucks_ with my family."

"Are you threatening me, Commander?" Udina's eyes narrowed but she could see the flash of fear.

"Never." She saluted Anderson and headed through the airlock.

* * *

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Cmdr. Shepard_

_Subj: Ambassador Udina_

_Did you really threaten our ambassador?_

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cmdr. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: Udina._

_I never threaten._

_Cara_

* * *

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Cmdr. Shepard_

_Subj: re: Udina_

_That's not the no I was looking for._

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cmdr. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: Udina._

_I'm a spectre. _

_Technically, if I did threaten him, you couldn't do a damn thing about it._

_But once again, I NEVER threaten._

_Cara_


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Cmdr. Shepard_

_Subj: Reporter_

_I received a complaint that you assaulted a reporter named __Khalisah Bint Sinan al-Jilani. _

_She claims that you attacked her in the restroom in Flux. There is no evidence to support her statements._

_Anything you'd like to share?_

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cmdr. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: Reporter_

_No._

_Cara_

* * *

Her second visit to the Citadel after picking up Doctor T'soni had been _eventful_. Admiral _Mikhailovich_ was less than thrilled with her refusal to let him onboard her the _Normandy_. She'd dealt with the puttana* of a reporter away from prying eyes and her damn camera. She'd shoved her gun in the face of Conrad Verner. And then she'd shot Finch in the head. The dipshit had actually though that she would be afraid of him or her past.

She sat in a tattoo parlor in the lower wards getting a large tattoo on her back. The new ink was the skeletal structure of a spinal cord that started at the base of her spine and went up to her neck. Along her shoulders attached to the line of bones, a set of skeletal wings spread out. It was a wicked looking tat.

The damn thing took over eight hours to finish. She sat with her head resting forward against the chair that she was sitting in when it was finished. She heard footsteps behind her and assumed the asari artist had come back to check on her. A chair pulled up in front of hers and a strong pair of hands grabbed hers.

"Vido," she muttered without bothering to look up. "How's the finger?"

"Nice tattoo." His fingers held her hands tightly while his thumbs caressed her gently. "I have a message for you."

"What message?" Cara lifted her head to meet his gaze.

"Rosa wanted me to tell you that she graduated from University." Vido released one of her hands to toss her a digital frame with the image of a familiar face in a graduation cap.

"Rosa." Cara stared down at the smiling face.

Rosa was at least ten years younger than Shepard. The bastard priest had been hurting her until Cara stepped in. It saved the little girl but put Cara on the top of his list. Life had been hell on Earth until Vido intervened. She never knew what happened to the girl.

"How did you…" She set the photo aside to look back up at him.

"I paid for her education," Vido shrugged indifferently.

"Why?"

"You sacrificed yourself for her. It should amount to something." He lifted her hand to kiss the scars that ran along the inside of her wrist. They were the leftovers of a brutal beating that he'd stumbled upon. It was the first time that they met. He'd dragged the priest away from her. Vido had put her on a transport for London with a fake ID and enough credits to take care of herself. "Come back to my apartment."

"No."

"Cara Mia, please?" Vido traced the scars with his tongue. "We'll share a glass of wine and talk."

"We are talking." She'd already wasted eight hours with the tattoo. She was due back on the _Normandy_ in less than an hour.

"Cara." He nipped the soft flesh along her wrist with his teeth.

_Merda._

"One hour. That's it. And then I have to head back to my ship." She caved in to what was clearly the inevitable. Cara reached back to grab her shirt and pulled it on before she stood up from the chair.

Vido kept a hand on her arm while he led her out of the tattoo shop to a skycab waiting nearby. Fifteen minutes later, she was sitting on his couch pointedly ignoring the wine that he'd offered. Drinking around Santiago was always a bad idea.

_Affanculo._

_This had been a terrible idea._

"You look uneasy, Cara." He sat beside her on the couch and rested a hand on her knee.

"What do you want Vido? Seriously? Why am I here? Is it just about fucking?" She pushed his hand away and surged to her feet. She glared down at him. "What the hell is this all about?"

Vido didn't get a chance to answer one of his men rushed into the apartment to whisper into his ear. "We have to leave."

"_We?_" Cara snorted. "You can leave. I have a ship and mission to get back to."

"Cara."

She ignored him and with an amused grin headed out of the apartment. He headed up to the landing pad on the top floor and Cara headed down to the lobby. She walked out of the building straight into Massani. _ Merda._ She now understood why the Blue Suns leader had been in such a hurry.

"You just missed him." She frowned when Zaeed grabbed her by the arm and began pulling her towards the skycab that he had apparently just exited.

"We need to talk," he muttered before shoving her into the passenger's seat.

"Every fucking dipshit wants to talk to me today." Cara glanced down at her omni-tool to check the time. The last thing that she needed was someone reporting her as missing. "Can this wait?"

Zaeed glared at her then focused on driving. He pulled out of the regular traffic to find a quiet, secluded area to park. "Why is it that every goddamn time I'm close to catching up to Santiago, I find you there as well?"

"Bad luck."

"Do not play with me, Little Bit." Massani seemed to be struggling to contain his temper.

"I'm not. I was getting a tattoo when Vido paid a surprise visit." Cara tapped her fingers on her leg. "I said that I wouldn't interfere, and I haven't."

"So why the hell were you heading out the front door when Santiago took a shuttle off of the roof?" Zaeed grabbed her hand to stop her fidgeting.

"Because I wasn't _leaving_ with him…" She trailed off while she thought about it for a moment. "_Merda._ That…he used me as a distraction. He knew that I wouldn't leave with him, he was counting on me running into you."

"Why wouldn't you be leaving with him?" He gave her a skeptical look.

Cara glared at him in response. "Take me back to the lower wards. I'm already late."

"Answer the question, Little Bit."

"I'm not _with_ Vido Santiago however you look at the definition of the word." She ground her teeth together in annoyance. "My allegiances are to myself first, then Hackett and Anderson and then the Alliance in that order. Vido doesn't fall into any of those categories."

"He thinks that he does." Zaeed's fingers began to stroke hers.

"He's delusional." She tried very hard to ignore the fact that just his fingers on hers were creating a reaction in her body.

"And where do I fit in?" He lifted her hand up and sucked one of her fingers into his mouth.

"Massani."

Zaeed slowly pulled her finger out of his mouth and chuckled when she glared at him. "I'll get you back to the _Normandy_."

**Puttana = Bitch**


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

_Faccia di stronzo._

Cara stared at the news article that she'd found on the extranet about the death of Rosa Brambati three years ago. She died in a tragic skycar accident. _An accident. Three years ago. _She had been looking for a way to contact Rosa when she found the report.

_Vido lied._

The real question was what had he stood to gain from the lie? The _Normandy_ docked at the Citadel after they'd destroyed the rachni on Noveria. Cara found the answer that she was looking for when she paid a visit to Barla Von.

After a little careful prodding, the volus informed her that Vido had asked him to track her movements on the Citadel. The Blue Suns apparently did a lot of work with the Shadow Broker, and this was one of the ways that he took payment. Vido preferred to conduct his business on the Citadel when Cara was on the station. He also tracked when Zaeed arrived and where he went.

It took a little more careful prodding at the threat of her position as spectre to convince Barla Von to start giving Vido false information. She sent Zaeed a message with what she had found out. The Volus also let her now as she was leaving that Vido was having drinks at Chora's Den. She made her way there.

"Cara?" He looked up in surprise when she wandered over to his table.

"Surprised?" Her eyes narrowed angrily. "Rosa died several years ago. I know the photo was faked."

"I thought…" Vido trailed off when Cara's hand wrapped around his throat.

She leaned down to mutter into his ear. "I am _not_ your personal barrier against Massani."

"Cara Mia."

She squeezed tighter. "I will rip your jugular out of your throat, Stronzo."

"You are drawing an audience, Cara." Vido gestured towards the bouncers watching them carefully. "Perhaps, you could strangle me in a more private location?"

Cara released him when one of the Krogan bouncers started moving towards her. "Zaeed Massani is the least of your worries. I'm a spectre. I can shoot you in the head and leave you to rot and no one can question why."

She started away from the table but he grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her into one of the private rooms off of the main bar. This time it was his hand around her throat as he slammed her against a wall.

"Threaten me again, Cara Mia, and you won't get a chance to invoke your spectre position." He gripped her wrist tightly when she tried to go for her gun. "None of that."

"Why the ruse about Rosa?" She asked.

"Having a spectre and Alliance Commmander working with me would be very useful." Vido shrugged indifferently. "And Massani seems to be very easily distracted when you are around."

Cara reached down to grab one of the shaped concussion mines that she'd been working on. It was still in the test phase. In theory, it should provide a non-lethal blast in the direction that it was aimed. She lifted it between them and set it off. It worked…sort of. The blast sent Vido flying across the room into the wall. It also slammed her hard against the wall behind her. She got to her feet first and was out the door before Vido had regained consciousness.

It wasn't until she stepped out of the elevator towards the _Normandy_ airlock that she realized that she was bleeding. She used her hand to cover the dried blood on her head while she headed through the ship to her quarters. Presly tried to get her attention but she ignored him. The reason for his urgency became clear when she found Admiral Hackett sitting in one of the chairs around the table in her room.

_Merda._

"Consider yourself saluted." She sank down into the chair opposite him and applied medi-gel to her forehead.

Hackett stood up and walked round the table to get a look at the gash on her head. "What the hell happened, Cara?"

"I was testing a new explosive, the one that I sent you the schematics for." Cara pushed him away impatiently. "I'm fine."

"Who is she?" Hackett picked up the photo of Rosa sitting on the table.

"An orphan, like me." Cara leaned back in the chair to prop her feet up on the table. "She was being abused at the orphanage. I stopped it."

"How?" Hackett set the photo down.

"I took her place." She ignored the concern in his eyes. "It was a long time ago."

"Is that why you left Rome for London?"

"Yes. Vido helped. Though now, I'm not entirely sure why he did it." Cara rubbed absently at the scarring on her wrist. "Did you need something?"

"I had a meeting with the ambassador. I just wanted to see how you were doing." He started for the door. "Get that head looked at."

"_Parents._" She rolled her eyes at him.

"And Cara? Do not test your explosives in enclosed spaces." Hackett gave her a knowing look before stepping out of her quarters.

She intended to pay a quick visit to the doc before setting a course for Feros but the flashing light at her terminal caught her attention.

* * *

_Inter-Relay Text Chat_

_Location: Citadel_

_From: Z. M._

_To: C. S._

_15:17 Z: Meet me at Flux._

_15:19 S: Why?_

_15:21 Z: Just bloody do it._

_15:22 User has disconnected._

* * *

Cara waited a good ten minutes before heading back towards the lower wards. She wanted to give Hackett enough time to get far enough away that she wouldn't risk running into him. She never actually made it to Flux. She was walking towards Flux when a hand grabbed her by the arm and dragged her into the enclosed alley that ran between Chora's den and the nearby elevator to the Presidum.

"Massani." She sighed in annoyance when he pulled her over into the alcove where she'd met with the assassins trying to kill Tali. "This is not Flux."

"Little Bit." He lifted her up against the wall, his hands holding her hips tightly. "What happened to your head?"

"I tested out a new explosive design." She grinned at him. "Vido was my test subject."

"Is he dead?"

"Not yet." Cara's eyes narrowed.

Zaeed smirked at her before leaning down to bite and tug on her bottom lip. Cara shifted up with her hands on his shoulders for leverage. She moved a hand around his neck. He released her lip only to crash his mouth down on hers. Their tongues dueled against each other's.

"Oh, Little Bit, we're gonna have a lot of fun together, sweetheart." He growled against her lips.

**faccia di stronzo – Son of a bitch**


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N:**

**I realize that I'm taking liberties with the game canon a bit in this, as theoretically you'd only get either the besieged base or negotiation mission in the game. But I needed both, so I'm messing with canon.**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

_From: Admr. Hackett_

_To: Cmdr. Shepard_

_Subj: What the hell happened?_

_What part of rescue the scientists did you not comprehend, Commander?_

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cmdr. Shepard_

_To: Admr. Hackett_

_Subj: re: scientists._

_They were drugged out of their fucking minds._

_Merda._

_They kept walking in front of our gunfire._

_Would you have preferred me to let the biotic bastards kill me and my squad? You told me to clear the base out; the base has been cleared out. The threat neutralized._

_Cara_

* * *

Her mood hadn't improved a few hours later when she stepped back into her quarters covered in thorian guts. Hackett wasn't going to be pleased when he found out they'd failed to save a single colonist. It was simple as far as Cara was concerned. If a gun was raised in her direction, she planned on raising one back. And in a perfect world, she'd have an explosive headed towards them as well.

Then he sent her to _negotiate _with Darius. She'd found it strange that he wanted her to peacefully negotiate a diplomatic agreement. And then she met the power hungry idiot. _Peaceful…right. _ Hackett had sent her to kill the bastard. He'd given her the bullshit line about the Alliance not authorizing assassinations and her temper went through the roof. She had Joker disconnected the comm and headed towards her quarters. She sent the Admiral a message from her personal, non-Alliance account.

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett_

_Subj: Darius._

_Do not EVER judge me for the decisions that I make again._

_Not if you're going to use me as nothing more than a fucking assassin. If I wanted to do that, I would've taken up the offer to join the Blue Suns. I am not a fucking thug. And I'm not an idiot. If you want me to handle a problem, don't lie to me about it._

_And don't repeat that bullshit line about, 'The Alliance doesn't condone assassination. We would never give that order.' You've never lied to me before. Why start now?_

_Merda. _

_Cara_

_._

* * *

_From: Hackett_

_To: Cara_

_Subj: re: Darius._

_Meet me on Arcturus._

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett_

_Subj: re: Arcturus._

_Is that an order?_

_If it isn't, the answer is no._

_I'm heading to the Citadel after I handle your little VI problem on the moon. _

_If you're so desperate to talk in person, find me on the Citadel._

_Cara_

* * *

_From: Hackett_

_To: Cara_

_Subj: re: Arcturus._

_Not an order, a request._

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett_

_Subj: re: Arcturus._

_Then you have my answer._

_I'm angry and disappointed and this conversation over._

_Cara_

* * *

_Affanculo_

It wasn't Hackett who met her at the docks on the Citadel. That was probably a good thing. Cara wasn't sure how she'd respond if she saw him at the moment. Being used hadn't been something that she'd ever associated with Hackett. Captain Anderson stood waiting patiently. She waved Wrex and Garrus past before she approached Anderson. Of her _guardians_, he tended to disapprove of her behavior the most which was probably why the thing with Hackett had hurt more than she was willing to admit.

"Commander."

_Merda._

"Captain." She snapped a salute at him

"Cara," his tone softened.

"What?" Her tone did not soften.

"You did good on the Moon." He tried another tactic.

"What does_ Admiral Hackett_ want?" Cara had better things to do than fucking wait around for him to spit it out. "Isn't it usually the other way around? You disapprove and he mediates?"

"Cara, don't be childish." Anderson frowned at her.

"Childish?" Cara took a step towards him then thought better of it. "I have council business to attend to. Excuse me, _Captain._"

Anderson followed her into the elevator. "Talk to him."

"How? I'm not telepathic," she muttered. "Fucking parents."

"He's…"

"_Me ne frega."_ She stepped out of the elevator and headed towards the skycab terminal.

"What?"

"Look it the fuck up." Cara slid into the seat and closed the door in his face.

Her council business wrapped itself up fairly quickly. She decided to avoid the Presidium and Embassy just in case Hackett had decided to visit. She was nursing a drink in Chora's Den when Vido slid into the seat across the table.

Affanculo.

"Go away," she muttered into her ryncol, her third glass to be precise. "I have no shits left to give today to anyone."

"Problems, Cara Mia?" He reached out for her hand.

Cara grabbed his wrist before he could touch her and twisted his arm around. "Not in the mood, Vido. Not in the mood. Test me and I will break it. "

"The Alliance giving you trouble. I heard that a certain warlord is dead. There is quite a power void that's been created by his assassination. Did they have trouble controlling their little pet?" Vido glanced down at her fingers still wrapped around his wrist. "If you were interested in being a paid assassin, you should know the Suns pay a lot better than the Alliance."

Her fingers tightened on his wrist before letting go. "I am not a gun for hire."

"Are you sure about that, Cara?" He touched a finger to the hand she had clutched around her glass. "Don't break the glass."

"Vaffanculo." She stood up to head for the door. When he started to follow, she grabbed him by the throat and slammed him to the ground. "I will not be toyed with by you or the Alliance or anyone else for that matter. Do you understand me, Santiago? Do not play with me."

He reached up to touch a hand to her jaw. "I'm not the one playing with you."

"Cosa vuoi?" Cara muttered before pulling him up off the floor.

"You know the answer to that." He brushed off his armor and reached for her again.

"Vai al diavolo!" She shoved him away and stormed out of the club.

Cara knew every word out of his mouth was more than likely a lie and she'd had enough for one day. Stepping into the elevator, she remembered that she still needed to follow up with the Consort to make sure that the dipshits had stopped spreading the rumors about her.

"Commander Shepard."

Cara halted mid-step to glance over her shoulder to find Hackett walking towards her. Merda. "Admiral."

"A moment of your time?" He placed a firm hand on her arm to guide her to the Embassy and into Udina's empty office.

"I am so tired of men dragging me around." She collapsed into a chair and propped her boots up on Udina's desk. "The next one who tries it is getting dragged around by his dick."

"Have you been drinking?" Hackett frowned at her.

"Ryncol is strong shit." Cara stared at him. "Maybe not you, I have no desire to see you naked at all. None."

Hackett pinched the bridge of his nose for a long moment. "Cara? Why were you drinking ryncol and who the hell was dragging you around?"

"Vido and Massani. They're always dragging me around when I see them the fuckers." She suddenly remembered why she avoided drinking around Hackett or Anderson. "I should go."

"Sit down." He frowned at her. "And why are you running into the leader of the Blue Suns?

"He runs into me." She leaned back in the chair again. "He offered me a job again. Seemed to think the Suns paid assassins betters than the Alliance. Thanks for that."

"It wasn't…"

"Don't lie to me, Hackett." She surged to her feet. "I can deal with being used by the Alliance for my notorious temper and lack of control. But you're like...merda."

"I'm like shit?" Hackett smiled at her. "Are you sure it was just one glass of ryncol?"

"I never said it was one." She glared at him. "Next time tell me the truth, or send someone else. I don't like feeling like I'm a gun for hire. I'm a soldier and an explosives expert. If I wanted to be anything else, I wouldn't have risked my life to get out of the Reds."

"It's a fine line but I understand your point." Hackett nodded his agreement after a moment.

"I'm leaving before I do something stupid like hug you." Cara started past him.

Hackett reached out to pull her into a hug and laughed when she shoved him away. "Anderson told me that it was my job to fix it. Can I consider it fixed?"

"Dipshit parents," she muttered at him before wandering out of the office.

Cara wasn't as drunk as she'd appeared for Hackett. She had one last errand to run before she headed back to the Normandy. She needed to check on Doctor Michel to make sure the thugs had left her alone. She was walking towards the clinic when Vido stepped in front of her. She backed up right into one of his lieutenants who pressed a rifle into her back.

"Vido."

"Cara." He grabbed her by the shoulder and dragged her into a waiting shuttle. He pushed her into one of the seats then crouched in front of her. "I'm tired of waiting. I want you in the Suns…and in my bed."

"So gun point was your preferred method of persusion? Dipshit." She slammed her fist into his jaw and ducked around the turian with the rifle.

She tossed one of her concussive grenades towards the pilot at the other end of the shuttle. She kicked the turian towards Vido, knocking them both towards the grenade just as it exploded. They crashed into the viewing deck on one of the lower wards. Cara stumbled out of the wreckage of the shuttle and blindly away from it. She managed to get into the elevator that headed up to the Presidium and leaned against the wall before sliding to the ground.

There was definitely blood trickling down her neck so she must've banged her head in the crash. Her shoulder had popped out of joint. She pulled her knee up to her chest and wrapped her arms around it. She pulled and pressed until the joint popped back in. The elevator doors opened and she glanced up to find Zaeed staring down at her.

"Merda."

Zaeed stepped quickly into the elevator and lifted her up off the ground. He helped her across the Presidium into a nearby skycab. He took them to the apartment that he kept on the station. He sat her down on a recliner and checked the wound on her head.

"What the hell happened?" He applied medi-gel and grabbed wet cloth to clean the blood from her neck.

"Vido."

"Bastard." Zaeed frowned at her. "Where is he?"

"In the crashed shuttle last time I saw him." She shrugged then winced as it pulled at her still sore shoulder. She was about to comment further when her omni-tool beeped with an incoming hail. She pulled it up expecting it to be Vido. It wasn't. "Admiral."

"A shuttle just crashed on the Citadel. A Blue Suns shuttle. There were no occupants when C-sec got to the scene of the crash. They did find the remains of a unique concussive grenade inside and footage of someone who looked strangely familiar limping away from the crash. Are you ok?" Hackett frowned at her. "Is that Massani?"

"Affanculo." Cara groaned and disconnected the call. "Oops."

"He'll call back." Zaeed went back to gently tending to her wounds. He stepped back around in front of her. "It's not too serious. You'll probably have a headache for a day or two. Are you hurt anywhere else?"

Cara reached up to touch the tattoo on his neck. "I need to get back to the Normandy before they send out a search party."

Zaeed just watched while she traced a finger around his tattoo and across his jaw to his lips. "Little Bit?"

"Shut up." She muttered before leaned forward to replace her finger with her lips. "We'll finish this when I'm not recovering from a concussion."

"Finish what?"

She slid her hand around his neck to pull him into a deeper kiss. "This."

**Me ne frega = I couldn't care less.**

**Cosa vuoi = What do you want?**

**Vai al diavolo! = Go to hell!**


	10. Chapter 09

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

Cara sat in her quarters fussing with the schematics for a new idea that she had for a timed electrical pulse mine. She always futzed with explosives when she was upset. It helped her keep calm. And it let her channel her energy into something productive. She was connecting a few critical components when a knock on the door caused her to fuck it up.

_Faccia di stronzo._

_"Come in." She bent over to pick the prototype off of the floor. She glanced up to find Alenko watching her. "L.T.?"_

_"We've arrived at the Citadel." Alenko stepped further into the room. "The salarians have already left the ship. William's body was just picked up. Captain Anderson sent a message asking you to meet him at the Ambassador's office."_

_"Alenko, I know all of that already. Joker just sent me a message. What do you want?" Cara gave him an impatient look._

_"I…"_

_Affanculo._

_She shoved away from the table to head for the door. "I'll be on the Presidium."_

"What the hell did you do to your hair?" Anderson frowned at her the minute that she walked into Udina's office.

Cara ran a hair over her newly cut hair. It was now more of a green buzz cut, maybe a little longer than a buzz cut. "You don't like it?"

"Cara."

"That's a no. Merda. You are never satisfied with my hair." She flopped dramatically into Udina's desk chair. "Where's the dipshit?"

"Ambassador Udina is speaking with the council. Please try for once in your life not to swear in any language, including Italian." Anderson frowned at her with his eyes focused on her hair. "Green. Always green."

"I look good in green," she shrugged.

It took an incredibly amount of effort to restrain herself from shooting Udina in the head when she discovered that he'd locked out the _Normandy_. She had cursed at him with every phrase that she could think of until her voice went hoarse. Anderson finally dragged her away and told her to go cool off on the ship.

_Vaffanculo_

She slammed her fist into her locker in annoyance. Alenko stepped over to speak with her but her omni-tool beeped. She waved the L.T. off and checked her messages. Zaeed wanted her to meet him in Chora's Den. Joker called to her when she was heading towards the airlock to let her know that Anderson was waiting in Flux. She decided to meet with Massani first.

"Scotch?" He slid his glass over to her when she sat across from him.

Cara took a long sip. "I thought you were heading for the Terminus Systems."

"I was."

"And?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"You promised to finish something, and I want to bloody finish it." He leaned across the table to grab her shirt and yank her up into a kiss.

"Merda. Are you serious?" Cara smirked at him when he released her. "I…"

"Commander…this is _not_ Flux." Anderson's hand clamped down on her shoulder. He lifted her up out of her seat and pulled her towards the door. "What the hell were you doing?"

"Having a drink?" She frowned at him. "I was going to meet up with you next."

"I have a plan." Anderson decided to come back to the Massani issue later.

"Is it a good plan?"

"It's the only one we have." He let go of her shoulder and gave her the details of the plan.

She decided to let him decide which option to go with since it was his risk to take. She ordered the crew to head back to the ship to wait for the Captain to release the _Normandy._ The moment that they were cleared, she had Joker start for Ilos. Saren was _not_ going to get away from her again.

* * *

_Inter-Relay Text Chat_

_Location: Arcturus_

_From: Hackett_

_To: Shepard_

_13:12 H: I understand that the Normandy has been liberated from its oppressors._

_13:14 S: It was not my idea._

_13:15 H: I know, that's what worries me._

_13:17 S: Merda. For once? I didn't do anything wrong. I didn't even shoot Udina in the head. Even if the dipshit deserved it._

_13:18 H: I will happily give you a damn medal for it if you managed to find Saren. If you don't, you can kiss your career and Anderson's goodbye._

_13:19 S: Thank you for the vote of confidence._

_13:20 User has disconnected._

* * *

It was several hours before Cara dragged herself over the pile of rubble. She'd managed to dislocate her damn shoulder again. _Affanculo._ She clambered up over another section of the tower that had been destroyed and found Anderson waiting with Wrex and Garrus who had been with her. He looked incredibly relieved to see her.

"Thatfaccia di stronzo is finally dead." She held her arm as she stood in front of the Captain.

"You did good." Anderson looked at her in concern. "Is it broken?"

"Dislocated."

He rushed her off to the hospital wing. Cara wasn't sure what the big deal was. If they'd just let her sit on the floor for a minute, she could've popped her shoulder back in. Once the doctor relocated it, she was dragged into a conversation with Anderson and Udina. She'd made the decision to sacrifice the Destiny Ascension to save the fleets for the attack on Sovereign.

Udina wanted to immediately seize the power void that had been created. Cara thought that was the worst idea that she'd ever heard. She suggested that Anderson lead the way. They'd never listen to her but it was worth voicing her opinion. She left the two men to argue and headed down to Flux to grab a drink with the crew. It was one of the few places that hadn't been damaged by the attack.

"So…how's the big goddamn hero?" Zaeed was loitering by the entrance.

"Thirsty."

"I've got a bottle of whiskey in my apartment. It's much better than the shit Doran serves." He smirked at her.

"Is it?" She raised an eyebrow at him. "I think the cost of your whiskey is a little higher than Doran's."

"It's bloody free."

"With men like you, Massani, it's never free." Cara took a step towards him. "I'm just asking myself if the whiskey is overpriced."

"Little Bit." Zaeed gripped her forearm tightly. "Is that a goddamn yes or no?"

"Cara."

"_Vai al diavolo," _she muttered under her breath before turning to find Hackett watching her and Massani. She glanced back to Zaeed. "I'd make a quick exit, if I were you."

"This isn't over. When your goddamn guardians aren't in the way, message me." Zaeed kissed the side of her neck and disappeared into the nearby elevator.

"How's my career looking?" Cara waited until Hackett had caught up to her before heading into Flux.

"I am constantly amazed at your ability to avoid trouble." Hackett ordered drinks for both of them. "Stay away from Massani, Cara. He's trouble."

"I know." Her grin faded at the angry look on her guardian's face. "Che cosa vuoi da me? I just saved the Citadel and managed to take out a rogue spectre. Can you bother me about my taste of men another day? _Merda._"

"I want you to be … safe," Hackett sighed.

"Then you shouldn't have sent me to the Alliance." Cara tilted her head to the side. "Enjoy your drink, Admiral. _Vai con dio._"

"Cara."

She paused next to him as she headed away. "I'm sure Anderson's waiting for you. Talk to him. You can berate me for my bad choices later. There's always plenty of time for you to yell at me."

C**he cosa vuoi da me – What do you want from me**

**Vai con Dio – Go with God**


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N:**

**I'm futz'ing with some of the in-game(and comicbook) canon here, so this is definitely a little more AU-ish.**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

Hackett stood at the memorial on Elysium. The crowds were gone except for Anderson. He'd given his damn speech, and now he leaned with his hands on top of it. "You yelled at her too much."

"True." Anderson rested his hand on the Admiral's shoulder. "She'd hate this memorial. She'd invent new phrases in Italian to cuss at our utter stupidity."

"She'd graffiti it." Hackett laughed at the thought. He could just imagine what Cara would think of the pomp and circumstance around her death. "She'd test one of her explosives on it."

"We should've told her." Anderson pulled him away from the memorial. "We should've told her that she was more like a daughter than anything else."

"Her response would've been to call us dipshits." Hackett had a feeling that he was going to be thinking up a lot of things that she'd be annoyed about in the coming years.

* * *

_From: Unknown _

_To: Liara T'soni_

_Subj: Commander Shepard's Body. _

_The Shadow Broker's agent to the Commander's body to Alingon._

_If you hurry, you might get there before it's gone again._

_A friend_

* * *

Vido stared down at the message that he'd just sent. When Tarak had taken the mission from the Shadow Broker, he hadn't told Vido whose body it was. He hadn't discovered it was Cara until after they'd already turned the body over to the Shadow Broker's agent. It was too fucking late to do anything about it then. He knew T'soni was hunting the body as well, so he figured a message was better than nothing.

_Tarak_.

He decided to send the batarian to Omega. It was punishment. Tarak hated Omega. He hated dealing with Aria. Maybe next time, he'd give Vido all the details before accepting a job.

_Two years later._

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett; Anderson_

_Subj: I'm Back._

_Nice memorial on Elysium, by the way._

_I kinda want to deface it._

_Miss me?_

_Cara_

* * *

Cara was supposed to find three of the _suggested squad_ from the dossiers that the Illusive Man gave her on Omega. Zaeed had been easy to find. He'd been beating up a batarian right outside the airlock. Mordin had been a little more difficult to _obtain._ But now, she was sneaking her way in as a mercenary-for-hire to find Archangel.

"Tarak?" What the bloody hell are you doing on Omega?" Zaeed frowned at Blue Suns cell leader.

"Punishment," Tarak grimaced. "Vido took exception to the fact that I agreed to a job without getting all the damn details."

"What job?" Zaeed took a step closer.

"Retrieving a body from Alchera." He looked over at Cara. "Her body."

_Affanculo._

"What?" Cara's fingers itched to pull her gun and blast the dipshit in the eyes…all of them.

"Vido flipped out when he found out it was your body that we gave to the Shadow Broker. He even sent an anonymous message to someone who was trying to find you." Tarak glanced back down at the blueprints. "And _I _got sent to the damn slums."

"Why would he care if it was me?" Cara knew that Vido would've have given a damn if enough credits were involved.

"Ask him about Mercedes sometime." Tarak looked her up and down. "Now get the hell out of here, freelancer."

_Dipshit._

Zaeed pulled her out of the line of sniper fire as they walked over to speak with Cathka. He pushed her against one of the columns. "Tarak doesn't know what the bloody hell he's talking about."

Cara raised an eyebrow at him. "Oh?"

"Vido didn't give a damn about Mercedes." Zaeed leaned down so that the nearby Blue Suns couldn't hear. "Trust me, Little Bit; if Vido did have a change of heart about your body, it was because he already had the goddamn credits."

"Let's just get Archangel. I don't have time to deal with all the dipshits in my life." Cara ducked around his arm and headed over to speak with the mechanic.

* * *

_Inter-Relay Text Chat_

_Location: Omega_

_From: Cara_

_To: Vido_

_22:16 C: Tell me about Mercedes._

_22:21 V: She was my wife. She died in an accident a long time ago._

_22:23 C: What does she have to do with me?_

_22:26 V: You have similar eyes and a similar temper. That's what stood out to me that day that I saved you from the priest. I saw those eyes and couldn't walk away._

_22:31 C: Tarak's dead._

_22:33 V: Oh?_

_22:34 C: I blew up his gunship._

_22:35 V: Good._

_22:38 C: Good? What the hell do you mean good? I killed one of your unit leaders. Merda. You really were pissed off at him._

_22:40 V: That's what the bastard gets for not getting all the details of the Shadow Broker job._

_22:42 C: Explain to me in terms that I won't consider bullshit why you would give a damn about what happened to my body._

_22:49 V: They should've let you rest in peace. You deserved it. You saved all those stupid bastards and none of them gave a shit. _

_22:51 V: You may not believe me, Cara Mia, but if I'd known who the job was for and what they planned to do with your body, I would've stopped Tarak from handing it over._

_22:54 C: Well…your Blue Suns crew on Omega is…significantly reduced. Sorry…not really…but merda. I have to go._

_22:56 V: Cara Mia._

_22:57 C: Cosa Vuoi?_

_22:59 V: Mi sei mancato._

_23:01 C: Do I look like a gullible little moron, Vido? _

_23:02 V: I did._

_23:03 C: Ciao. Stronzo._

_23:04 User has disconnected._

* * *

"Who are you talking to?" Zaeed stepped into the Communications room to find Cara standing with her omni-tool open. She had what looked like schematics spread across the table.

"Vaffanculo." She closed out whatever she'd been doing to go back to the datapad. "Did you need something, Zaeed?"

"Why are you up so bloody late, Little Bit?" He moved closer.

"I can't sleep." Cara's eyes flitted up to meet his then back down. "I thought I'd work on an idea that I had for a new kind of flammable explosive. It helps me relax."

"I can help you relax." Zaeed smirked at her.

He watched her concentrate on the design of her explosive. She ran her hand through her bright green hair while biting the corner of her lip. He knew why Vido was so interested in her. Cara bore a striking resemblance to Mercedes. Zaeed had no intention of letting the goddamn bastard get anywhere close to her though. He'd wanted her from the moment he saw her on Elysium and he was tired of fucking waiting.

Her sharp brown eyes looked up at him. "I know Vido's a lying bastard."

"Vido?" Zaeed frowned at her. _Goddamn mind reader._

"You get that annoyed look on your face when you're thinking about him." Cara moved around the table to look at the prototype of her design that she'd already built. She used tweezers to move a few parts around. "Merda. I can't figure out why this won't work."

"It's late, Little Bit. Maybe you should take a break?" Zaeed stepped up behind her and began massaging her shoulders.

"I told you, I can't sleep." Her muscles tensed when she spoke. It made him wonder.

"Why can't you sleep?" He turned her around so she was facing him.

"The Illusive Man has a sick sense of humor. _Faccia di stronzo."_ She muttered the curse as an afterthought.

"What the bloody hell are you talking about?" Zaeed didn't necessarily disagree with her assessment.

"Here, help me carry this up to my quarters." She shoved several of the datapads at him while grabbing the prototype herself.

Zaeed followed her into the elevator and up to the first deck. The moment he stepped into her living area, he knew exactly why she was having trouble sleeping. The giant viewing window over the bed. _Blodoy hell._ For someone who had died in space, it probably just encouraged nightmares.

"Can you close it?" He set her schematics down on the desk next to her private terminal.

"No." Cara gently placed her prototype on her other desk and sat on the edge of the bed. "Sometimes, I wake up and I forget that I'm in the ship…and not…floating."

"Can I try to solve the problem for you?" Zaeed had an idea.

"Just don't break the ship." She grinned at him.

**Mi sei mancato – I've missed you**


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace. **

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

Cara was in her bed in her quarters staring up at the no longer visible viewing window. Zaeed, had while she was on Omega wrapping up something with Aria, gotten into her quarters and covered it with one of her favorite views of Rome. She wasn't sure where he'd gotten the massive image or how he'd hung it up, but she didn't care. It had led to the best night of sleep ever.

She'd also found a small set of electronic components in a cool little chest that came with tools as well. It reminded her of the set that she'd owned back when she was in the Alliance. The damn thing probably cost a thousand credits at least.

_Merda._

"EDI?" Cara started towards the door. She paused by the blue orb. "Tell Joker to head to Osun. It's time to pick up Jack."

Zaeed wasn't in his area of the ship when she got to the third deck. She headed back up to the CIC to hang out with Joker. She found it incredibly amusing to watch him argue with EDI. They were like an old married couple. An hour later, Garrus and Zaeed were joining her as she headed over to the prison ship.

_It was always the damn Blue Suns._

_Affanculo._

"Commander Shepard." Warden Kuril stepped over to speak with her after they'd all accepted the fact that she wasn't handing over her weapons. "If you could step inside my office over here for a moment, I have some last-minute paperwork. Your squad can head towards outsourcing."

Against her better judgment, and from the look on his face, Zaeed's, Cara followed Kuril towards the room off to the right. Zaeed and Garrus headed down the hall in the opposite direction to go pick up their _package_. Kuril stopped the minute that they got inside the room.

"Vido?"

Cara's head snapped up when the turian mentioned the familiar name. "Merda."

"Did you think that I wouldn't find out that you intended to capture Shepard and sell her to the highest bidder?" Vido advanced on the Warden with his pistol drawn. He shoved him up against the nearby wall. "I made my orders clear to you. I do _not_ like disobedience."

"But think of the…" Kuril didn't get another word in edgewise as Vido shot him in the head.

Cara perched on the edge of the desk in the room and watched the turian's body slide to the floor. "Dipshit."

"Cara Mia." Vido holstered his weapon and stepped over the body towards her. He grabbed her by the chin and tilted her head from side to side to look at her. He ran his fingers through her green hair. "It's good to see you alive. There's a nice memorial for you on Elysium. I paid my respects in Rome though. Lit a candle in your favorite chapel, the one you used to hide in."

Cara swatted his hand away from her head. "Che cazzo vuoi?"

"I heard that Kuril had decided to double-cross you. And I figured it was a perfect time to see you and take care of him at the same time." He rested his hands on either side of her on the desk.

"Since when do you turn down credits?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"I don't," Vido shrugged. "You are an exception."

"Perché?"

He leaned in until his lips hovered over hers. "You know why, Cara Mia."

"That is not an answer, Vido." She lifted her hand up to separate their mouths. "How the hell am I going to explain the dead warden?"

"You're going to end up fighting through the ship to get to Jack, anyway. I'm leaving, unless you want to go with me?"

"_Vaffanculo." _She flipped him off.

"That's a no, then?" He pulled her hand down and kissed her.

She pushed him away. "Merda."

"Cara."

Her hand shot out to grab him by the collar and yanked him back over. He smirked down at her before sliding his hands into her hair and she crushed her lips against his. Their tongues dueled for a moment before she shoved him away a second time and stood up from the desk.

"I'd recommend you not tell Massani about this." Vido started for the door on the other side of the room.

"_Faccia di stronzo," _Cara muttered when he was gone.

They did end up fighting their way through the damn prison. The guards weren't all that impressed when they discovered Kuril's body. It took them a while to fight through the prison and corral Jack into the ship. They were on their way to the Citadel next. She wanted to check in with Anderson. But first, she wanted to talk to Hackett.

* * *

_Inter-Relay Text Chat_

_Location: Citadel_

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett_

_18:12 C: Hey._

_18:14 H: Cara?_

_18:18 C: I have…a problem._

_18:21 H: What problem?_

_18:22 C: Merda. I can't talk to you about this. Nevermind._

_18:23 H: Cara? Talk to me. _

_18:25 C: It's a personal…problem…a man…men…type problem._

_18:32 H: Ahh. _

_18:34 C: This is…forget I said anything. _

_18:36 H: It's not a…sexual problem, is it?_

_18:40 C: Affanculo. Non. It's not. Exactly._

_18:43 H: Maybe you should ask Anderson for advice._

_18:46 C: Non. That would be even worse._

_18:48 H: I will pay you a thousand credits to ask Anderson for advice on sex._

_18:51 C: Really?_

_18:52 H: No._

_18:53 C: Dipshit. _

_18:54 C: It's not like I have parents that I can ask for advice. You and Anderson are the closest thing that I have._

_18:55 H: Why me? Why not him?_

_18:56 C: You disapprove of me less. He always has this air of disappointment, makes me feel like he regrets not just turning me over to the authorities in London._

_19:01 H: So…tell me about the two men._

_19:03 C: You won't like either of them. _

_19:06 H: Why don't you skip to the advice that you need?_

_19:19 H: Cara?_

_19:21 C: I don't care about love and all that shit. I just want to have a little fun. I was dead, I deserve some fun. But…fun with one of the two men…it would end badly. Very badly…the fatal kind of bad._

_19:23 H: So why even consider him?_

_19:26 C: He's a damn good kisser._

_19:27 H: Are the kisses worth the price that you'll pay?_

_19:39 C: Non. Merda. Non. They aren't._

_19:41 H: Then you have the answer._

_19:43 C: Grazie._

_19:44 H: I received the prototype that you sent me. The techs on Arcturus are impressed with the complexity of it. _

_19:46 C: I may be on a Cerberus vessel, but I know where my loyalties lie._

_19:47 H: The Alliance is grateful._

_19:48 C: Merda. My loyalties are to you and Anderson, first. Ciao._

_19:49 User has disconnected._

* * *

Cara stepped out of her quarters as Zaeed was stalking out of the elevator towards her. "Zaeed?"

"You left out a bit of bloody information about what happened on Purgatory." He backed her up into her living area. "Who shot the Warden in that office?"

"Vido."

"Did you enjoy having fucking sex on the desk?" Zaeed wrapped his fingers tightly around her jaw.

"_Vaffanculo_." Cara's eyes narrowed angrily. "I did not have sex with Vido. I haven't _had sex_ in…a long time."

"He claims…"

"He lied." Cara rolled her eyes. "_Stronzo_. He lied to you. We kissed, yes, I'll admit that. Not that it's any of your business. But I didn't fuck him. I have no intention of doing so."

"Really?" Zaeed looked skeptical. His fingers tightened on her.

"I don't owe you an answer or an explanation. And I've given you all of either of those that I'm going to." Cara lifted her hand up to tap a finger on his. "Now stop hurting my jaw."

"You feel the need to fucking kiss someone, Little Bit. You come fucking find me." He eased his hold on her slightly while leaning down to trace her lips with his tongue. "You know where I'll be."

_"Cazzo. Cazzo. Cazzo."_ She watched him storm back out of the room before banging her head lightly against the wall. With an annoyed sigh, she headed towards the elevator to go meet with Anderson.

* * *

_From: Hackett_

_To: Cara_

_Subj: Anderson_

_Did you REALLY tell Anderson that I told you to ask him if green spots were normal on a man…down there?_

_Really?_

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett_

_Subj: re: Anderson._

_I'll take those 1,000 credits now._

_Cara_

* * *

_Inter-Relay Text Chat_

_Location: Citadel_

_From: Cara_

_To: Vido_

_23:03 C: Is there a reason that you told Zaeed that we'd fucked on the desk?_

_23:04 C: Aside from the fact that you are a faccia di stronzo._

_23:09 V: Are you angry that I lied or that Zaeed knows anything at all?_

_23:13 C: Vaffunculo._

_23:15 V: That is not an answer._

_23:16 V: And you can lie to yourself all you want, Cara Mia, but that second kiss…that was you kissing me._

_23:18 C: Non mi rompere il cazzo._

_23:21 V: Reminder. You kissed me._

_23:22 V: And you liked it. Good night, Cara Mia._

_23:23 User has disconnected._

* * *

**Che cazzo vuoi – What the hell do you want?**

**Non mi rompere il cazzo – Don't fuck with me.**

**Perché – Why?**


	13. Chapter 12

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**I'm taking a lot of liberties with what happens on Zorya, FYI.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace.**

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

_From: Vido_

_To: Cara_

_Subj: Omega_

_Meet me there._

_We need to talk._

_Vido_

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Vido_

_Subj: re: Omega_

_Non._

_No._

_Never._

_Cara_

* * *

_From: Vido_

_To: Cara_

_Subj: re: Omega_

_So that's a no?_

_Vido_

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Vido_

_Subj: re: Omega_

_Don't you have a mercenary organization to run?_

_Or someone else to annoy?_

_Cara_

* * *

_From: Vido_

_To: Cara_

_Subj: re: Omega_

_You're the one who keeps responding, Cara Mia._

_Do you miss me?_

_Vido_

* * *

It seemed that no matter what she did, Cara could not get away from the Blue Suns.

_Merda._

Vido was not going to be amused when he discovered that she'd completely decimated the entire operation on Korlus. They'd managed to get rid of Jedore and obtain the _baby Krogan_. The fucker didn't look like a baby.

When he had her up against the wall, he certainly didn't feel like one either. It had only taken one bullet to the leg for him to understand that she was in charge. She sent him to the Med Bay to get patched up and she headed up to her quarters. The Illusive Man had them on their way to Horizon to check out the potential attack from the Collectors.

* * *

_Inter-Relay Text Chat_

_Location: Illium_

_From: Vido_

_To: Cara_

_11:12 V: Do you enjoy destroying my bases?_

_11:17 C: Is that a trick question?_

_11:23 V: Cara Mia._

_11:24 V: Stop killing my Commanders. I only have so many of them._

_11:25 C: Are you actually trying to tell me to stop killing mercenaries? _

_11:26 C: Merda. We've had this conversation before._

_11:28 V: Why did you take the last tank from the facility?_

_11:30 C: Wouldn't you like to know?_

_11:32 V: Yes. I would. So tell me._

_11:34 C: Perche?_

_11:35 V: Cara._

_11:38 C: Why do people always say my name like it's going to magically make me say something different?_

_11:40 V: If you tell me, I'll bring you __Ciambelle al Vino__ back from my trip to Rome._

_11:43 C: F__accia di stronzo._

_11:44 V: I'm getting some from that little place that you took me to._

_11:46 C: I will not be bribed._

_11:47 V: Ok then. I'll just eat them myself._

_11:51 C: C__iucciami il cazzo._

_11:52 V: You don't have one._

_11:53 C: Merda. Ciao._

_11:54 User has disconnected. _

* * *

Horizon.

Cara had never really been a fan of the idea of colonies, not since Elyisum had gone so badly. She liked Earth. She tolerated being in space. So Horizon was just another example of why they annoyed her. They had managed to save at least some of the fucking colonists. And then Alenko had been a self-righteous cazzo.

He seemed to be suffering under the delusion that she cared about his opinion at all.

'_I know where my loyalties lie.'_

The trouble with soldiers like Alenko was that they assumed everyone evaluated things like they did. Cara's loyalties had never changed or wavered since the age of eighteen. _Affanculo._

* * *

_From: Hackett_

_To: Cara_

_Subj: Alenko. _

_I have received a report from a concerned member of the Alliance who believes that not only have your loyalties changed but that you are actively working with a terrorist organization._

_Something that you'd like to share?_

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett_

_Subj: Re: Alenko._

_My loyalties? _

_My loyalties have always been to you and Anderson. I've never made a secret of that. Do you think I'd ever betray you or him?_

_You know what I'm doing. So stop fucking with me._

_Besides I've got bigger problems than that f__accia __di stronzo._

_Cara_

* * *

The mess did not have beautifully crunchy wine flavored cookies. It didn't have decent food at the moment. She grabbed a glass of wine and plate of left-overs and took a seat at the table to eat. She'd made sure to get a good stock of wine when she'd got the better supplies on the Citadel. It was late in the evening and everyone else was either in their bunk or at their station.

"Little Bit." Zaeed grabbed a plate of food for himself and sat across from her.

"We're heading to Zorya next." She took a sip of the wine. "Is there a particular reason why you're so hot and bothered about this Blue Suns base?"

"Just another job," Zaeed shrugged indifferently.

"Hmm." Cara grabbed her plate and headed over to the sink. She glanced back at Zaeed. "We'll be there at 0900. Be ready."

"Little Bit?"

"I know you're leaving something out about this mission. I don't know what or why, but… non mi rompere il cazzo." She paused to translate when he gave her a confused look. "Do not fuck with me."

They hopped out of the shuttle the following morning on Zorya to liberate the refinery. The minute that Cara heard Vido's voice over the comm, she knew why Zaeed had wanted to take the _mission_ to free the workers. He didn't give a damn about them, this was about revenge.

_Merda._

They made it to the gatehouse with relative ease. And that was where things started to get a little complicated. Cara muttered every Italian curse in her repertoire.

"Zaeed Massani. You finally tracked me down." Vido leaned against the railing on the balcony above them. "Cara Mia. Why am I not surprised to see you here?"

"Vido." Zaeed raised his rifle and began firing at the pipes until one of them exploded. He banged on the nearby valve to create a larger explosion that rocked the facility and gave them the opening that they needed to get inside.

Tracking Vido through the facility was relatively easy; they just had to follow the troops that he threw in their path. He was making his escape when Zaeed shot him in the leg and he fell into the highly flammable liquid that had pooled on the ground.

"Are you going to watch me die, Cara?" Vido ignored Zaeed and focused his attention on her instead. "Is that any way to repay me for that day in Rome?"

"Fry, you son of a bitch." Zaeed flung a thermal clip from his pistol towards Vido.

"_Merda_. No." Cara dived forward to grab that thermal clip out of the air. She tossed it clear. She grabbed Zaeed around the neck and dragged him away from the injured Vido. She pressed him into Garrus' arms. "Get him back to the shuttle, and for fuck's sake, keep him there."

_Affanculo. _

Zaeed was going to kill her for this.

Cara headed over to where Vido was collapsed on the ground. She lifted him up by the arm and pulled him out of the pool of liquid towards his gunship where his men were waiting. She shoved him into their arms and started to walk away.

"Cara Mia."

She turned back around. "Cosa vuoi?"

"He won't forgive you for this." Vido leaned on one of his Lieutenant's for support while the other applied medi-gel to his leg.

"What's it to you, Vido?" Cara frowned at him. "I have to go."

"Why'd you do it?" His question stopped her from leaving.

"You didn't stand by and watch while I was beaten." Cara shrugged with more indifference than she felt. She watched him limp towards her.

"Cara Mia." He touched his finger to her chin. "Massani won't let this go. He's going to blame you."

"And?" She swatted his hand away. "I can handle Massani. I handle you, _Stronzo_."

"Baciami."

"_Non._" Cara took a step back away from him. "Ciao."

"Cara?"

She ignored him and continued back to the shuttle where Zaeed was fuming. "Let him go, Garrus. Give us a minute, will you?"

Garrus stepped out of the Kodiak to leave them to hash it out. The moment he was gone, Zaeed had Cara up against the shuttle with his hand around her neck.

"That's the second goddamn time that you've gotten between me and Vido. What the fucking hell are you thinking? I should put a bullet through your head," he growled at her.

"So do it then, dipshit. Or get the fuck off of me." Cara was not going to be intimidated by him.

"He shot me in the goddamn head," Zaeed yelled at her.

"You _can be_ incredibly annoying." She raised an eyebrow at him.

"_Little Bit."_ Zaeed's voice changed and she was instantly suspicious. He tilted his head until he was leaning close enough that his lips brushed her jaw. His fingers loosened on her neck and started to stroke her. "Do you _want_ Vido?"

"_Non_."

"Are you sure?"

She glared up at him. "What are you doing?"

"What does it fucking look like?" He titled her head up and captured her lips with his. He bit her lower lip before thrusting his tongue between her lips.

Cara grabbed a hold of his armor to keep her balance as she leaned into his kiss. His hand still firm on her neck while he explored her mouth.

"Shepard? Are you in danger? I can't really tell." Garrus stood just inside the shuttle with his weapon pointed at Zaeed.

"_Merda." _Her head dropped back against the shuttle as Zaeed reluctantly released her. "No. I'm not. But we should get the hell out of here anyway."

"We will pick this up later." Zaeed whispered against her ear before he moved over to take a seat. "And I will fucking end Vido. Do _not_ interfere again."

**Ciambelle al Vino – little wine flavored donut shaped cookies.**

**Baciami – Kiss Me**


	14. Chapter 13

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace.**

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

_Inter-Relay Text Chat_

_Location: Illium_

_From: Cara_

_To: Vido_

_11:19 C: Did you really go to Rome?_

_11:22 V: I did. Yesterday, actually._

_11:29 V: I got __Ciambelle al Vino for you._

_11:31 V: I can meet you on Illium. I even have a private apartment to help you avoid Massani finding out._

_11:33 C: Why would I say yes to that?_

_11:34 V: Because you want to see me._

_11:41 V: I'll send you the directions for where I'll be. You can decide whether to show up or not._

_11:42 User has disconnected._

* * *

While Cara ran around hacking terminals for Liara, she told herself that she wouldn't give in to the urge to hop in a cab to go see Vido. She promised Liara that she'd meet up with her later and headed out to grab a cab to find the Justicar named Samara. Once they had her back on the _Normandy_, Cara paced the floor of her quarters for a while. It was late in the evening when she finally gave in and headed back out the airlock.

_Affanculo._

_What the hell was she doing?_

"Hello." Vido did not seem surprised to see her when the door slid open. He stepped back to let her inside the room.

"I'm only here for the _Ciambelle." __Cara took a moment to scan the room cautiously but Vido appeared to be alone._

_"On the table." Vido gestured towards the small table near the kitchen. _

_Cara started towards the table but stopped as she moved past him. Vido was dressed in just jeans and the medallion around his neck caught her attention. She changed directions to step in front of him. Her fingers touched the necklace. "You still have it?"_

_"You haven't seen me out of my armor in a while." He covered her fingers with his. "Did you think I'd throw it away?"_

_"_Sì, certo." Cara pulled her hand out of his and moved over towards the table. It was a much safer distance from him. She grabbed one of the little treats and began munching on it while she watched him. "Why keep it?"

"You gave it to me." Vido shrugged as if that explained everything. "You didn't have a thing to your name. You barely had any clothes on, but you had that damn Saint's medal. It didn't seem right to throw it away."

Cara leaned back against the table while reaching for a second biscuit. "_Perchè_?"

Vido stood up and stalked towards her. He grabbed the biscuit from her hand and set it back on the plate. His hand rested firmly on the side of her head with his thumb stroking her cheek. His other arm drifted around her waist. He leaned down until his lips hovered over hers. "Why? Cara Mia, when will you understand?"

She didn't get a chance to respond. He crushed her against him while his lips moved against hers. Kissing Vido was always a bad idea. Letting him kiss her was a bad idea, participating in it was an even worse idea. He pushed back from her a bit. Cara leaned on the table behind her and told herself to get a fucking grip.

"I should go." She grabbed another one of the desserts and darted around him to head for the door.

"_Cara."_

The smart thing to do would be to continue towards the door. The devil in her told her to turn back around. Cara always listened to the devil on her shoulder. She glanced back to find Vido perched on the edge of the table with his hands resting in his jeans pocket.

"Che cosa vuoi da me?" Cara hesitated by the door.

"Why don't you let me show you?" Vido didn't make a move towards her. "Vieni qui e baciami."

"Non."

"Non?" He raised an eyebrow at her. "Sei sicuro?"

"Non." Cara stood her ground but that didn't help much if it meant she also hadn't left yet._ "Merda."_

"Cara Mia." Vido beckoned her towards him.

"You are a terrible idea." Cara began stepping backwards to the door. She stopped when her back hit the door.

Vido followed her to the door. His hands rested on her sides as he pulled her flush against him. "Are you leaving?"

She touched a finger to the chain around his neck once more. "I am."

"Your feet don't appear to be moving." His fingers stroked her sides. "I'm not asking you to join the fucking Suns or betray your precious _guardians._ All I want is one night."

"It's never just one night." Cara pressed her hand over the scar that ran across his collarbone. "_Merda."_

"The door isn't sealed. I won't stop you." His gaze shifted down to her lips. "Do you want to leave?"

**Sì, certo – Yes, Of Course**

**Vieni qui e baciami – Come here and kiss me.**

**sei sicuro – Are you sure?**


	15. Chapter 14

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace.**

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

"Where the _bloody hell_ are you?" Zaeed's voice echoed over the comm.

_Affanculo._

Cara glanced down at the top of the head of the man trying to unzip her pants. She shoved her knee into him lightly in the chest to knock him back. He glared up at her. "What do you want, Zaeed? I'll be back on the ship in a few minutes."

"_Admiral bloody Hackett_ is trying to reach you. Seems rather _annoyed_ that you aren't responding." Zaeed didn't apparently enjoying playing the messenger boy role.

_Merda._

"I'll be there momentarily." Cara frowned at Vido who was blocking her path. She turned off her comm so Zaeed could hear her anymore. "Move, _stronzo_, before I cut off something that you might miss."

"Cara Mia. You really need to stop leaving me like this." Vido stood up and tugged her against his body so she could _feel_ what he was talking about. "Hackett can wait a little longer."

"Non, he really can't." She tried to push back but he kept a firm grip on her arms. "Lasciami andare."

"Perch_é_?" He brushed his lips against her chin.

"Don't do this to me, Vido." Cara moved her hand up to separate their mouths. Vido kissed the palm of her hand instead. "I'd really like to avoid hurting you again."

"Then don't." His fingers drifted up her abdomen underneath her shirt. "I certainly don't _enjoy_ it when you do."

"_Vaffanculo." _Cara muttered when his fingers grazed the underside of her breast. With an aggravated sigh, she stomped her boot on his instep then raised her knee into his chest when he bent over. "When I say let me go, _Vido_, I mean it."

She was still angry when she got back to the _Normandy_, with herself mostly, Vido was a seductive bastard. But he was bound to have an ulterior motive, even if she couldn't figure out what it was. She told Chambers to transfer Hackett's call up to her quarters. Zaeed was waiting for her by the door.

"Sit, and be quiet." She pointed towards the couch before stepping up to the comm. "Hackett."

"Cara." He looked ticked off.

"What did I do now?" She scratched her chin for a moment.

"I appreciate your latest schematics, I'm sure the Alliance can use upgraded technology. But please don't booby-trap the package next time. My yeoman does not have a sense of humor." Hackett lost the slightly annoyed look and smiled at her.

"Mi dispiace," Cara shrugged. "Can this wait until later? I'm…in the middle of something."

"Message me." Hackett made it sound like an order.

With that out-of-the-way for the moment, Cara stepped around to where Zaeed was smoking a cigarette. She took it from him and ground it out on the bottom of her boot. He grabbed her by the rest and yanked her down into his lap. She struggled with him and ended up on her back with him on top of her.

"Comfortable?" She kept her arms loose by her side.

"Little Bit, where were you this evening?" He growled at her.

Cara brought her knee up and launched him off of her. He crashed into the coffee table and rolled on to the floor. She swung around until she was sitting up. She leaned back and propped her feet up on the coffee table which was a lot fucking sturdier than she'd imagined.

"Little Bit?" Zaeed leaned up on his elbows to look at her.

"I'm going to make something clear, dipshit. If you want to get in that bed with me, trying to overpower me is not the way to do it, è chiaro?" She reached over to grab the prototype that he'd narrowly missed crashing into. She hunted around in the little chest for a small screwdriver and began tinkering with it.

She forgot everything when she worked on electronics, all the stress and idiotas around her just faded into nothing. She didn't know how long she'd been working when a finger tapped against her knee. Her head lifted up to find that Zaeed was sitting next to her on the couch. He handed her a cup of fresh coffee. She sipped it to find that he'd made it perfectly the way she liked it.

"Grazie." She muttered into the coffee. "Why are you still up here?"

"You're goddamn fascinating to watch," he shrugged and leaned back on the couch with a glass of what smelled like scotch in his hand. "Is it a bloody problem?"

"Non." Cara took another sip of coffee before glancing back at him. "Why is Vido so interested in me?"

"Mostly? Mercedes," Zaeed shrugged. "If he's capable of feeling fucking guilt, I'd wager he feels it about her."

"Perch_é_?"

"He's the reason that she's dead." Zaeed watched her face carefully. "He fucking told you that it was an accident, didn't he? No… Little Bit, it wasn't a fucking accident. The bastard killed her, not with his own gun, but he was fucking behind it. He thought that she was fucking with someone else. She wasn't. He didn't find that out until later."

_Merda._

"He wants a second chance." Cara felt all the confused puzzle pieces falling together in her head like a schematic. "I will not be a goddamn ghost for someone."

**lasciami andare – Let me go**

**Mi dispiace - Sorry**

**è chiaro? – Clear?**

**Grazie - Thanks**


	16. Chapter 15

**A/N:**

**Rated M, mostly because I like to cuss like a sailor in life and in my stories and also rated M for other things in later chapters.**

**If anyone's interested, I'm writing an alternate version of this over on AO3 called Prayers for the Wicked.**

**Thanks for the reviews, follows & Favorites.**

**Beta: CelticGrace.**

**Bioware owns all. Sadly.**

Cara snuck into Zaeed's room on the fourth deck to leave the coordinates to Vido's apartment on Illium. She had a feeling that more than fucking Mercedes, Vido had been using her as a shield. The dipshit had banked on her _not_ letting him die. If he had taught her anything over the years, it was that once a debt was paid, it was wise to not continuing paying.

_She'd saved his life once._

_He'd saved her life once._

_Vai con Dio._

Garrus and Jack accompanied her on the next mission on Illium. By the time that she finished with Liara's mission, she trudged up to her quarters to find a familiar necklace hanging from one of her ship models. She fingered the medal for a moment.

It was 0200 when she saw Zaeed again. Joker was scanning for minerals, and hating her. Cara had schematics spread out on the table in the mess. She'd started to work on the second deck but Mordin kept fucking bugging her. _Merda. _He liked to talk. So she headed to the mess. A sound caught her attention and she glanced up to find a cup of coffee.

She took a sip before looking up at the man sitting across from her. "So?"

"I made it quick, for your sake." Zaeed looked over the blueprints on the table.

"Grazie mille." She set the coffee cup down. "I'd say that I feel some remorse over his death."

"But you don't. You were a born goddamn mercenary." Zaeed smirked at her.

"Forse," Cara shrugged. She turned her attention back to the electronics in front of her. She did regret Vido's death in a way. And she didn't want to delve into that too deeply. She gathered up the blueprints and started for the elevator, leaving a confused Zaeed watching her.

* * *

_From: Hackett_

_To: Cara_

_Subj: Vido Santiago._

_He turned up dead in an alley, shot in the head._

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett_

_Subj: re: Vido Santiago._

_And?_

_I didn't have anything to do with it. I've been…very busy._

_Merda._

_How'd you find out anyway?_

_Cara_

* * *

_From: Hackett_

_To: Cara_

_Subj;: re: Vido Santiago._

_Anderson heard about it and passed the information on._

_I didn't think that you did have something to do with it. Though your immediate defense makes me wonder._

_What's going on?_

_Hackett_

* * *

_From: Cara_

_To: Hackett_

_Subj: Nothing._

_I didn't pull the trigger. I wasn't there when it happened._

_Cara_

* * *

_Inter-Relay Text Chat_

_Location: Arcturus_

_From: Hackett_

_To: Shepard_

_13:04 H: What's wrong?_

_13:09 S: N__iente._

_13:10 H: Are you sure about that?_

_13:11 S: Si. _

_13:12 S: I have to go. We're about to head to Haestrom._

_13:13 H: You can talk to me, Cara. I won't judge you._

_13:24 S: I didn't cause his death. But I didn't stop it either. _

_13:25 H: You aren't normally bothered by the death of mercenaries._

_13:26 S: Vaffanculo. I don't usually know them personally and they usually haven't saved my life at some point._

_13:28 S: It doesn't matter. He's dead, and I won't mourn the dipshit. _

_13:29 S: Have a good evening, Admiral._

_13:30 User has disconnected._


End file.
